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+const char* wonderland[] = {
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+ "Project Gutenberg’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, by Lewis Carroll",
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+ "This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with",
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+ "almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or",
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+ "re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included",
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+ "with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org",
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+ "Title: Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland",
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+ "Author: Lewis Carroll",
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+ "Posting Date: June 25, 2008 [EBook #11]",
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+ "Release Date: March, 1994",
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+ "Last Updated: October 6, 2016",
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+ "Language: English",
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+ "Character set encoding: UTF-8",
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+ "*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ALICE’S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND ***",
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+ "ALICE’S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND",
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+ "Lewis Carroll",
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+ "THE MILLENNIUM FULCRUM EDITION 3.0",
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+ "CHAPTER I. Down the Rabbit-Hole",
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+ "Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the",
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+ "bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the",
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+ "book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in",
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+ "it, ‘and what is the use of a book,’ thought Alice ‘without pictures or",
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+ "conversations?’",
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+ "So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could, for the",
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+ "hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether the pleasure",
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+ "of making a daisy-chain would be worth the trouble of getting up and",
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+ "picking the daisies, when suddenly a White Rabbit with pink eyes ran",
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+ "close by her.",
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+ "There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice think it so",
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+ "VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say to itself, ‘Oh dear!",
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+ "Oh dear! I shall be late!’ (when she thought it over afterwards, it",
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+ "occurred to her that she ought to have wondered at this, but at the time",
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+ "it all seemed quite natural); but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH",
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+ "OUT OF ITS WAISTCOAT-POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried on,",
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+ "Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that she had",
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+ "never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch",
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+ "to take out of it, and burning with curiosity, she ran across the field",
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+ "after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop down a large",
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+ "rabbit-hole under the hedge.",
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+ "In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how",
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+ "in the world she was to get out again.",
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+ "The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way, and then",
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+ "dipped suddenly down, so suddenly that Alice had not a moment to think",
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+ "about stopping herself before she found herself falling down a very deep",
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+ "well.",
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+ "Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had",
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+ "plenty of time as she went down to look about her and to wonder what was",
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+ "going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make out what",
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+ "she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she",
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+ "looked at the sides of the well, and noticed that they were filled with",
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+ "cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps and pictures",
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+ "hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as",
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+ "she passed; it was labelled ‘ORANGE MARMALADE’, but to her great",
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+ "disappointment it was empty: she did not like to drop the jar for fear",
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+ "of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as",
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+ "she fell past it.",
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+ "‘Well!’ thought Alice to herself, ‘after such a fall as this, I shall",
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+ "think nothing of tumbling down stairs! How brave they’ll all think me at",
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+ "home! Why, I wouldn’t say anything about it, even if I fell off the top",
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+ "of the house!’ (Which was very likely true.)",
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+ "Down, down, down. Would the fall NEVER come to an end! ‘I wonder how",
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+ "many miles I’ve fallen by this time?’ she said aloud. ‘I must be getting",
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+ "somewhere near the centre of the earth. Let me see: that would be four",
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+ "thousand miles down, I think--’ (for, you see, Alice had learnt several",
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+ "things of this sort in her lessons in the schoolroom, and though this",
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+ "was not a VERY good opportunity for showing off her knowledge, as there",
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+ "was no one to listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over)",
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+ "‘--yes, that’s about the right distance--but then I wonder what Latitude",
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+ "or Longitude I’ve got to?’ (Alice had no idea what Latitude was, or",
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+ "Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to say.)",
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+ "Presently she began again. ‘I wonder if I shall fall right THROUGH the",
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+ "earth! How funny it’ll seem to come out among the people that walk with",
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+ "their heads downward! The Antipathies, I think--’ (she was rather glad",
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+ "there WAS no one listening, this time, as it didn’t sound at all the",
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+ "right word) ‘--but I shall have to ask them what the name of the country",
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+ "is, you know. Please, Ma’am, is this New Zealand or Australia?’ (and",
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+ "she tried to curtsey as she spoke--fancy CURTSEYING as you’re falling",
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+ "through the air! Do you think you could manage it?) ‘And what an",
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+ "ignorant little girl she’ll think me for asking! No, it’ll never do to",
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+ "ask: perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere.’",
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+ "Down, down, down. There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon began",
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+ "talking again. ‘Dinah’ll miss me very much to-night, I should think!’",
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+ "(Dinah was the cat.) ‘I hope they’ll remember her saucer of milk at",
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+ "tea-time. Dinah my dear! I wish you were down here with me! There are no",
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+ "mice in the air, I’m afraid, but you might catch a bat, and that’s very",
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+ "like a mouse, you know. But do cats eat bats, I wonder?’ And here Alice",
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+ "began to get rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself, in a dreamy",
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+ "sort of way, ‘Do cats eat bats? Do cats eat bats?’ and sometimes, ‘Do",
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+ "bats eat cats?’ for, you see, as she couldn’t answer either question,",
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+ "it didn’t much matter which way she put it. She felt that she was dozing",
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+ "off, and had just begun to dream that she was walking hand in hand with",
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+ "Dinah, and saying to her very earnestly, ‘Now, Dinah, tell me the truth:",
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+ "did you ever eat a bat?’ when suddenly, thump! thump! down she came upon",
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+ "a heap of sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over.",
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+ "Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to her feet in a moment:",
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+ "she looked up, but it was all dark overhead; before her was another",
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+ "long passage, and the White Rabbit was still in sight, hurrying down it.",
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+ "There was not a moment to be lost: away went Alice like the wind, and",
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+ "was just in time to hear it say, as it turned a corner, ‘Oh my ears",
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+ "and whiskers, how late it’s getting!’ She was close behind it when she",
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+ "turned the corner, but the Rabbit was no longer to be seen: she found",
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+ "herself in a long, low hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps hanging",
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+ "from the roof.",
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+ "There were doors all round the hall, but they were all locked; and when",
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+ "Alice had been all the way down one side and up the other, trying every",
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+ "door, she walked sadly down the middle, wondering how she was ever to",
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+ "get out again.",
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+ "Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged table, all made of solid",
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+ "glass; there was nothing on it except a tiny golden key, and Alice’s",
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+ "first thought was that it might belong to one of the doors of the hall;",
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+ "but, alas! either the locks were too large, or the key was too small,",
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+ "but at any rate it would not open any of them. However, on the second",
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+ "time round, she came upon a low curtain she had not noticed before, and",
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+ "behind it was a little door about fifteen inches high: she tried the",
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+ "little golden key in the lock, and to her great delight it fitted!",
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+ "Alice opened the door and found that it led into a small passage, not",
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+ "much larger than a rat-hole: she knelt down and looked along the passage",
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+ "into the loveliest garden you ever saw. How she longed to get out of",
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+ "that dark hall, and wander about among those beds of bright flowers and",
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+ "those cool fountains, but she could not even get her head through the",
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+ "doorway; ‘and even if my head would go through,’ thought poor Alice, ‘it",
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+ "would be of very little use without my shoulders. Oh, how I wish I could",
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+ "shut up like a telescope! I think I could, if I only knew how to begin.’",
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+ "For, you see, so many out-of-the-way things had happened lately,",
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+ "that Alice had begun to think that very few things indeed were really",
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+ "impossible.",
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+ "There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so she went",
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+ "back to the table, half hoping she might find another key on it, or at",
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+ "any rate a book of rules for shutting people up like telescopes: this",
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+ "time she found a little bottle on it, [‘which certainly was not here",
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+ "before,’ said Alice,) and round the neck of the bottle was a paper",
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+ "label, with the words ‘DRINK ME’ beautifully printed on it in large",
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+ "letters.",
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+ "It was all very well to say ‘Drink me,’ but the wise little Alice was",
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+ "not going to do THAT in a hurry. ‘No, I’ll look first,’ she said, ‘and",
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+ "see whether it’s marked “poison” or not’; for she had read several nice",
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+ "little histories about children who had got burnt, and eaten up by wild",
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+ "beasts and other unpleasant things, all because they WOULD not remember",
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+ "the simple rules their friends had taught them: such as, that a red-hot",
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+ "poker will burn you if you hold it too long; and that if you cut your",
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+ "finger VERY deeply with a knife, it usually bleeds; and she had never",
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+ "forgotten that, if you drink much from a bottle marked ‘poison,’ it is",
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+ "almost certain to disagree with you, sooner or later.",
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+ "However, this bottle was NOT marked ‘poison,’ so Alice ventured to taste",
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+ "it, and finding it very nice, (it had, in fact, a sort of mixed flavour",
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+ "of cherry-tart, custard, pine-apple, roast turkey, toffee, and hot",
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+ "buttered toast,) she very soon finished it off.",
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+ " * * * * * * *",
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+ " * * * * * *",
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+ " * * * * * * *",
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+ "‘What a curious feeling!’ said Alice; ‘I must be shutting up like a",
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+ "telescope.’",
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+ "And so it was indeed: she was now only ten inches high, and her face",
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+ "brightened up at the thought that she was now the right size for going",
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+ "through the little door into that lovely garden. First, however, she",
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+ "waited for a few minutes to see if she was going to shrink any further:",
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+ "she felt a little nervous about this; ‘for it might end, you know,’ said",
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+ "Alice to herself, ‘in my going out altogether, like a candle. I wonder",
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+ "what I should be like then?’ And she tried to fancy what the flame of a",
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+ "candle is like after the candle is blown out, for she could not remember",
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+ "ever having seen such a thing.",
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+ "After a while, finding that nothing more happened, she decided on going",
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+ "into the garden at once; but, alas for poor Alice! when she got to the",
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+ "door, she found she had forgotten the little golden key, and when she",
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+ "went back to the table for it, she found she could not possibly reach",
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+ "it: she could see it quite plainly through the glass, and she tried her",
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+ "best to climb up one of the legs of the table, but it was too slippery;",
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+ "and when she had tired herself out with trying, the poor little thing",
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+ "sat down and cried.",
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+ "‘Come, there’s no use in crying like that!’ said Alice to herself,",
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+ "rather sharply; ‘I advise you to leave off this minute!’ She generally",
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+ "gave herself very good advice, (though she very seldom followed it),",
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+ "and sometimes she scolded herself so severely as to bring tears into",
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+ "her eyes; and once she remembered trying to box her own ears for having",
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+ "cheated herself in a game of croquet she was playing against herself,",
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+ "for this curious child was very fond of pretending to be two people.",
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+ "‘But it’s no use now,’ thought poor Alice, ‘to pretend to be two people!",
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+ "Why, there’s hardly enough of me left to make ONE respectable person!’",
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+ "Soon her eye fell on a little glass box that was lying under the table:",
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+ "she opened it, and found in it a very small cake, on which the words",
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+ "‘EAT ME’ were beautifully marked in currants. ‘Well, I’ll eat it,’ said",
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+ "Alice, ‘and if it makes me grow larger, I can reach the key; and if it",
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+ "makes me grow smaller, I can creep under the door; so either way I’ll",
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+ "get into the garden, and I don’t care which happens!’",
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+ "She ate a little bit, and said anxiously to herself, ‘Which way? Which",
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+ "way?’, holding her hand on the top of her head to feel which way it was",
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+ "growing, and she was quite surprised to find that she remained the same",
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+ "size: to be sure, this generally happens when one eats cake, but Alice",
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+ "had got so much into the way of expecting nothing but out-of-the-way",
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+ "things to happen, that it seemed quite dull and stupid for life to go on",
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+ "in the common way.",
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+ "So she set to work, and very soon finished off the cake.",
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+ " * * * * * * *",
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+ " * * * * * *",
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+ " * * * * * * *",
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+ "CHAPTER II. The Pool of Tears",
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+ "‘Curiouser and curiouser!’ cried Alice (she was so much surprised, that",
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+ "for the moment she quite forgot how to speak good English); ‘now I’m",
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+ "opening out like the largest telescope that ever was! Good-bye, feet!’",
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+ "(for when she looked down at her feet, they seemed to be almost out of",
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+ "sight, they were getting so far off). ‘Oh, my poor little feet, I wonder",
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+ "who will put on your shoes and stockings for you now, dears? I’m sure",
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+ "_I_ shan’t be able! I shall be a great deal too far off to trouble",
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+ "myself about you: you must manage the best way you can;--but I must be",
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+ "kind to them,’ thought Alice, ‘or perhaps they won’t walk the way I want",
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+ "to go! Let me see: I’ll give them a new pair of boots every Christmas.’",
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+ "And she went on planning to herself how she would manage it. ‘They must",
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+ "go by the carrier,’ she thought; ‘and how funny it’ll seem, sending",
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+ "presents to one’s own feet! And how odd the directions will look!",
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+ " ALICE’S RIGHT FOOT, ESQ.",
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+ " HEARTHRUG,",
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+ " NEAR THE FENDER,",
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+ " (WITH ALICE’S LOVE).",
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+ "Oh dear, what nonsense I’m talking!’",
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+ "Just then her head struck against the roof of the hall: in fact she was",
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+ "now more than nine feet high, and she at once took up the little golden",
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+ "key and hurried off to the garden door.",
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+ "Poor Alice! It was as much as she could do, lying down on one side, to",
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+ "look through into the garden with one eye; but to get through was more",
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+ "hopeless than ever: she sat down and began to cry again.",
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+ "‘You ought to be ashamed of yourself,’ said Alice, ‘a great girl like",
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+ "you,’ (she might well say this), ‘to go on crying in this way! Stop this",
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+ "moment, I tell you!’ But she went on all the same, shedding gallons of",
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+ "tears, until there was a large pool all round her, about four inches",
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+ "deep and reaching half down the hall.",
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+ "After a time she heard a little pattering of feet in the distance, and",
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+ "she hastily dried her eyes to see what was coming. It was the White",
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+ "Rabbit returning, splendidly dressed, with a pair of white kid gloves in",
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+ "one hand and a large fan in the other: he came trotting along in a great",
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+ "hurry, muttering to himself as he came, ‘Oh! the Duchess, the Duchess!",
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+ "Oh! won’t she be savage if I’ve kept her waiting!’ Alice felt so",
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+ "desperate that she was ready to ask help of any one; so, when the Rabbit",
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+ "came near her, she began, in a low, timid voice, ‘If you please, sir--’",
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+ "The Rabbit started violently, dropped the white kid gloves and the fan,",
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+ "and skurried away into the darkness as hard as he could go.",
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+ "Alice took up the fan and gloves, and, as the hall was very hot, she",
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+ "kept fanning herself all the time she went on talking: ‘Dear, dear! How",
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+ "queer everything is to-day! And yesterday things went on just as usual.",
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+ "I wonder if I’ve been changed in the night? Let me think: was I the",
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+ "same when I got up this morning? I almost think I can remember feeling a",
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+ "little different. But if I’m not the same, the next question is, Who",
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+ "in the world am I? Ah, THAT’S the great puzzle!’ And she began thinking",
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+ "over all the children she knew that were of the same age as herself, to",
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+ "see if she could have been changed for any of them.",
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+ "‘I’m sure I’m not Ada,’ she said, ‘for her hair goes in such long",
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+ "ringlets, and mine doesn’t go in ringlets at all; and I’m sure I can’t",
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+ "be Mabel, for I know all sorts of things, and she, oh! she knows such a",
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+ "very little! Besides, SHE’S she, and I’m I, and--oh dear, how puzzling",
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+ "it all is! I’ll try if I know all the things I used to know. Let me",
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+ "see: four times five is twelve, and four times six is thirteen, and",
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+ "four times seven is--oh dear! I shall never get to twenty at that rate!",
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+ "However, the Multiplication Table doesn’t signify: let’s try Geography.",
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+ "London is the capital of Paris, and Paris is the capital of Rome, and",
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+ "Rome--no, THAT’S all wrong, I’m certain! I must have been changed for",
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+ "Mabel! I’ll try and say “How doth the little--“’ and she crossed her",
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+ "hands on her lap as if she were saying lessons, and began to repeat it,",
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+ "but her voice sounded hoarse and strange, and the words did not come the",
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+ "same as they used to do:--",
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+ " ‘How doth the little crocodile",
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+ " Improve his shining tail,",
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+ " And pour the waters of the Nile",
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+ " On every golden scale!",
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+ " ‘How cheerfully he seems to grin,",
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+ " How neatly spread his claws,",
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+ " And welcome little fishes in",
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+ " With gently smiling jaws!’",
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+ "‘I’m sure those are not the right words,’ said poor Alice, and her eyes",
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+ "filled with tears again as she went on, ‘I must be Mabel after all, and",
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+ "I shall have to go and live in that poky little house, and have next to",
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+ "no toys to play with, and oh! ever so many lessons to learn! No, I’ve",
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+ "made up my mind about it; if I’m Mabel, I’ll stay down here! It’ll be no",
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+ "use their putting their heads down and saying “Come up again, dear!” I",
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+ "shall only look up and say “Who am I then? Tell me that first, and then,",
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+ "if I like being that person, I’ll come up: if not, I’ll stay down here",
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+ "till I’m somebody else”--but, oh dear!’ cried Alice, with a sudden burst",
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+ "of tears, ‘I do wish they WOULD put their heads down! I am so VERY tired",
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+ "of being all alone here!’",
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+ "As she said this she looked down at her hands, and was surprised to see",
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+ "that she had put on one of the Rabbit’s little white kid gloves while",
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|
+ "she was talking. ‘How CAN I have done that?’ she thought. ‘I must",
|
|
|
+ "be growing small again.’ She got up and went to the table to measure",
|
|
|
+ "herself by it, and found that, as nearly as she could guess, she was now",
|
|
|
+ "about two feet high, and was going on shrinking rapidly: she soon found",
|
|
|
+ "out that the cause of this was the fan she was holding, and she dropped",
|
|
|
+ "it hastily, just in time to avoid shrinking away altogether.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That WAS a narrow escape!’ said Alice, a good deal frightened at the",
|
|
|
+ "sudden change, but very glad to find herself still in existence; ‘and",
|
|
|
+ "now for the garden!’ and she ran with all speed back to the little door:",
|
|
|
+ "but, alas! the little door was shut again, and the little golden key was",
|
|
|
+ "lying on the glass table as before, ‘and things are worse than ever,’",
|
|
|
+ "thought the poor child, ‘for I never was so small as this before, never!",
|
|
|
+ "And I declare it’s too bad, that it is!’",
|
|
|
+ "As she said these words her foot slipped, and in another moment, splash!",
|
|
|
+ "she was up to her chin in salt water. Her first idea was that she",
|
|
|
+ "had somehow fallen into the sea, ‘and in that case I can go back by",
|
|
|
+ "railway,’ she said to herself. (Alice had been to the seaside once in",
|
|
|
+ "her life, and had come to the general conclusion, that wherever you go",
|
|
|
+ "to on the English coast you find a number of bathing machines in the",
|
|
|
+ "sea, some children digging in the sand with wooden spades, then a row",
|
|
|
+ "of lodging houses, and behind them a railway station.) However, she soon",
|
|
|
+ "made out that she was in the pool of tears which she had wept when she",
|
|
|
+ "was nine feet high.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I wish I hadn’t cried so much!’ said Alice, as she swam about, trying",
|
|
|
+ "to find her way out. ‘I shall be punished for it now, I suppose, by",
|
|
|
+ "being drowned in my own tears! That WILL be a queer thing, to be sure!",
|
|
|
+ "However, everything is queer to-day.’",
|
|
|
+ "Just then she heard something splashing about in the pool a little way",
|
|
|
+ "off, and she swam nearer to make out what it was: at first she thought",
|
|
|
+ "it must be a walrus or hippopotamus, but then she remembered how small",
|
|
|
+ "she was now, and she soon made out that it was only a mouse that had",
|
|
|
+ "slipped in like herself.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Would it be of any use, now,’ thought Alice, ‘to speak to this mouse?",
|
|
|
+ "Everything is so out-of-the-way down here, that I should think very",
|
|
|
+ "likely it can talk: at any rate, there’s no harm in trying.’ So she",
|
|
|
+ "began: ‘O Mouse, do you know the way out of this pool? I am very tired",
|
|
|
+ "of swimming about here, O Mouse!’ (Alice thought this must be the right",
|
|
|
+ "way of speaking to a mouse: she had never done such a thing before, but",
|
|
|
+ "she remembered having seen in her brother’s Latin Grammar, ‘A mouse--of",
|
|
|
+ "a mouse--to a mouse--a mouse--O mouse!’) The Mouse looked at her rather",
|
|
|
+ "inquisitively, and seemed to her to wink with one of its little eyes,",
|
|
|
+ "but it said nothing.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Perhaps it doesn’t understand English,’ thought Alice; ‘I daresay it’s",
|
|
|
+ "a French mouse, come over with William the Conqueror.’ (For, with all",
|
|
|
+ "her knowledge of history, Alice had no very clear notion how long ago",
|
|
|
+ "anything had happened.) So she began again: ‘Ou est ma chatte?’ which",
|
|
|
+ "was the first sentence in her French lesson-book. The Mouse gave a",
|
|
|
+ "sudden leap out of the water, and seemed to quiver all over with fright.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, I beg your pardon!’ cried Alice hastily, afraid that she had hurt",
|
|
|
+ "the poor animal’s feelings. ‘I quite forgot you didn’t like cats.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not like cats!’ cried the Mouse, in a shrill, passionate voice. ‘Would",
|
|
|
+ "YOU like cats if you were me?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, perhaps not,’ said Alice in a soothing tone: ‘don’t be angry",
|
|
|
+ "about it. And yet I wish I could show you our cat Dinah: I think you’d",
|
|
|
+ "take a fancy to cats if you could only see her. She is such a dear quiet",
|
|
|
+ "thing,’ Alice went on, half to herself, as she swam lazily about in the",
|
|
|
+ "pool, ‘and she sits purring so nicely by the fire, licking her paws and",
|
|
|
+ "washing her face--and she is such a nice soft thing to nurse--and she’s",
|
|
|
+ "such a capital one for catching mice--oh, I beg your pardon!’ cried",
|
|
|
+ "Alice again, for this time the Mouse was bristling all over, and she",
|
|
|
+ "felt certain it must be really offended. ‘We won’t talk about her any",
|
|
|
+ "more if you’d rather not.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘We indeed!’ cried the Mouse, who was trembling down to the end of his",
|
|
|
+ "tail. ‘As if I would talk on such a subject! Our family always HATED",
|
|
|
+ "cats: nasty, low, vulgar things! Don’t let me hear the name again!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I won’t indeed!’ said Alice, in a great hurry to change the subject of",
|
|
|
+ "conversation. ‘Are you--are you fond--of--of dogs?’ The Mouse did not",
|
|
|
+ "answer, so Alice went on eagerly: ‘There is such a nice little dog near",
|
|
|
+ "our house I should like to show you! A little bright-eyed terrier, you",
|
|
|
+ "know, with oh, such long curly brown hair! And it’ll fetch things when",
|
|
|
+ "you throw them, and it’ll sit up and beg for its dinner, and all sorts",
|
|
|
+ "of things--I can’t remember half of them--and it belongs to a farmer,",
|
|
|
+ "you know, and he says it’s so useful, it’s worth a hundred pounds! He",
|
|
|
+ "says it kills all the rats and--oh dear!’ cried Alice in a sorrowful",
|
|
|
+ "tone, ‘I’m afraid I’ve offended it again!’ For the Mouse was swimming",
|
|
|
+ "away from her as hard as it could go, and making quite a commotion in",
|
|
|
+ "the pool as it went.",
|
|
|
+ "So she called softly after it, ‘Mouse dear! Do come back again, and we",
|
|
|
+ "won’t talk about cats or dogs either, if you don’t like them!’ When the",
|
|
|
+ "Mouse heard this, it turned round and swam slowly back to her: its",
|
|
|
+ "face was quite pale (with passion, Alice thought), and it said in a low",
|
|
|
+ "trembling voice, ‘Let us get to the shore, and then I’ll tell you my",
|
|
|
+ "history, and you’ll understand why it is I hate cats and dogs.’",
|
|
|
+ "It was high time to go, for the pool was getting quite crowded with the",
|
|
|
+ "birds and animals that had fallen into it: there were a Duck and a Dodo,",
|
|
|
+ "a Lory and an Eaglet, and several other curious creatures. Alice led the",
|
|
|
+ "way, and the whole party swam to the shore.",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER III. A Caucus-Race and a Long Tale",
|
|
|
+ "They were indeed a queer-looking party that assembled on the bank--the",
|
|
|
+ "birds with draggled feathers, the animals with their fur clinging close",
|
|
|
+ "to them, and all dripping wet, cross, and uncomfortable.",
|
|
|
+ "The first question of course was, how to get dry again: they had a",
|
|
|
+ "consultation about this, and after a few minutes it seemed quite natural",
|
|
|
+ "to Alice to find herself talking familiarly with them, as if she had",
|
|
|
+ "known them all her life. Indeed, she had quite a long argument with the",
|
|
|
+ "Lory, who at last turned sulky, and would only say, ‘I am older than",
|
|
|
+ "you, and must know better’; and this Alice would not allow without",
|
|
|
+ "knowing how old it was, and, as the Lory positively refused to tell its",
|
|
|
+ "age, there was no more to be said.",
|
|
|
+ "At last the Mouse, who seemed to be a person of authority among them,",
|
|
|
+ "called out, ‘Sit down, all of you, and listen to me! I’LL soon make you",
|
|
|
+ "dry enough!’ They all sat down at once, in a large ring, with the Mouse",
|
|
|
+ "in the middle. Alice kept her eyes anxiously fixed on it, for she felt",
|
|
|
+ "sure she would catch a bad cold if she did not get dry very soon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Ahem!’ said the Mouse with an important air, ‘are you all ready? This",
|
|
|
+ "is the driest thing I know. Silence all round, if you please! “William",
|
|
|
+ "the Conqueror, whose cause was favoured by the pope, was soon submitted",
|
|
|
+ "to by the English, who wanted leaders, and had been of late much",
|
|
|
+ "accustomed to usurpation and conquest. Edwin and Morcar, the earls of",
|
|
|
+ "Mercia and Northumbria--“’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Ugh!’ said the Lory, with a shiver.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I beg your pardon!’ said the Mouse, frowning, but very politely: ‘Did",
|
|
|
+ "you speak?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not I!’ said the Lory hastily.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I thought you did,’ said the Mouse. ‘--I proceed. “Edwin and Morcar,",
|
|
|
+ "the earls of Mercia and Northumbria, declared for him: and even Stigand,",
|
|
|
+ "the patriotic archbishop of Canterbury, found it advisable--“’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Found WHAT?’ said the Duck.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Found IT,’ the Mouse replied rather crossly: ‘of course you know what",
|
|
|
+ "“it” means.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I know what “it” means well enough, when I find a thing,’ said the",
|
|
|
+ "Duck: ‘it’s generally a frog or a worm. The question is, what did the",
|
|
|
+ "archbishop find?’",
|
|
|
+ "The Mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on, ‘“--found",
|
|
|
+ "it advisable to go with Edgar Atheling to meet William and offer him the",
|
|
|
+ "crown. William’s conduct at first was moderate. But the insolence of his",
|
|
|
+ "Normans--” How are you getting on now, my dear?’ it continued, turning",
|
|
|
+ "to Alice as it spoke.",
|
|
|
+ "‘As wet as ever,’ said Alice in a melancholy tone: ‘it doesn’t seem to",
|
|
|
+ "dry me at all.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘In that case,’ said the Dodo solemnly, rising to its feet, ‘I move",
|
|
|
+ "that the meeting adjourn, for the immediate adoption of more energetic",
|
|
|
+ "remedies--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Speak English!’ said the Eaglet. ‘I don’t know the meaning of half",
|
|
|
+ "those long words, and, what’s more, I don’t believe you do either!’ And",
|
|
|
+ "the Eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile: some of the other birds",
|
|
|
+ "tittered audibly.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What I was going to say,’ said the Dodo in an offended tone, ‘was, that",
|
|
|
+ "the best thing to get us dry would be a Caucus-race.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What IS a Caucus-race?’ said Alice; not that she wanted much to know,",
|
|
|
+ "but the Dodo had paused as if it thought that SOMEBODY ought to speak,",
|
|
|
+ "and no one else seemed inclined to say anything.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why,’ said the Dodo, ‘the best way to explain it is to do it.’ (And, as",
|
|
|
+ "you might like to try the thing yourself, some winter day, I will tell",
|
|
|
+ "you how the Dodo managed it.)",
|
|
|
+ "First it marked out a race-course, in a sort of circle, [‘the exact",
|
|
|
+ "shape doesn’t matter,’ it said,) and then all the party were placed",
|
|
|
+ "along the course, here and there. There was no ‘One, two, three, and",
|
|
|
+ "away,’ but they began running when they liked, and left off when they",
|
|
|
+ "liked, so that it was not easy to know when the race was over. However,",
|
|
|
+ "when they had been running half an hour or so, and were quite dry again,",
|
|
|
+ "the Dodo suddenly called out ‘The race is over!’ and they all crowded",
|
|
|
+ "round it, panting, and asking, ‘But who has won?’",
|
|
|
+ "This question the Dodo could not answer without a great deal of thought,",
|
|
|
+ "and it sat for a long time with one finger pressed upon its forehead",
|
|
|
+ "(the position in which you usually see Shakespeare, in the pictures",
|
|
|
+ "of him), while the rest waited in silence. At last the Dodo said,",
|
|
|
+ "‘EVERYBODY has won, and all must have prizes.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But who is to give the prizes?’ quite a chorus of voices asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why, SHE, of course,’ said the Dodo, pointing to Alice with one finger;",
|
|
|
+ "and the whole party at once crowded round her, calling out in a confused",
|
|
|
+ "way, ‘Prizes! Prizes!’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair she put her hand in her",
|
|
|
+ "pocket, and pulled out a box of comfits, (luckily the salt water had",
|
|
|
+ "not got into it), and handed them round as prizes. There was exactly one",
|
|
|
+ "a-piece all round.",
|
|
|
+ "‘But she must have a prize herself, you know,’ said the Mouse.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course,’ the Dodo replied very gravely. ‘What else have you got in",
|
|
|
+ "your pocket?’ he went on, turning to Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Only a thimble,’ said Alice sadly.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Hand it over here,’ said the Dodo.",
|
|
|
+ "Then they all crowded round her once more, while the Dodo solemnly",
|
|
|
+ "presented the thimble, saying ‘We beg your acceptance of this elegant",
|
|
|
+ "thimble’; and, when it had finished this short speech, they all cheered.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, but they all looked so grave",
|
|
|
+ "that she did not dare to laugh; and, as she could not think of anything",
|
|
|
+ "to say, she simply bowed, and took the thimble, looking as solemn as she",
|
|
|
+ "could.",
|
|
|
+ "The next thing was to eat the comfits: this caused some noise and",
|
|
|
+ "confusion, as the large birds complained that they could not taste",
|
|
|
+ "theirs, and the small ones choked and had to be patted on the back.",
|
|
|
+ "However, it was over at last, and they sat down again in a ring, and",
|
|
|
+ "begged the Mouse to tell them something more.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You promised to tell me your history, you know,’ said Alice, ‘and why",
|
|
|
+ "it is you hate--C and D,’ she added in a whisper, half afraid that it",
|
|
|
+ "would be offended again.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Mine is a long and a sad tale!’ said the Mouse, turning to Alice, and",
|
|
|
+ "sighing.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It IS a long tail, certainly,’ said Alice, looking down with wonder at",
|
|
|
+ "the Mouse’s tail; ‘but why do you call it sad?’ And she kept on puzzling",
|
|
|
+ "about it while the Mouse was speaking, so that her idea of the tale was",
|
|
|
+ "something like this:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Fury said to a",
|
|
|
+ " mouse, That he",
|
|
|
+ " met in the",
|
|
|
+ " house,",
|
|
|
+ " “Let us",
|
|
|
+ " both go to",
|
|
|
+ " law: I will",
|
|
|
+ " prosecute",
|
|
|
+ " YOU.--Come,",
|
|
|
+ " I’ll take no",
|
|
|
+ " denial; We",
|
|
|
+ " must have a",
|
|
|
+ " trial: For",
|
|
|
+ " really this",
|
|
|
+ " morning I’ve",
|
|
|
+ " nothing",
|
|
|
+ " to do.”",
|
|
|
+ " Said the",
|
|
|
+ " mouse to the",
|
|
|
+ " cur, “Such",
|
|
|
+ " a trial,",
|
|
|
+ " dear Sir,",
|
|
|
+ " With",
|
|
|
+ " no jury",
|
|
|
+ " or judge,",
|
|
|
+ " would be",
|
|
|
+ " wasting",
|
|
|
+ " our",
|
|
|
+ " breath.”",
|
|
|
+ " “I’ll be",
|
|
|
+ " judge, I’ll",
|
|
|
+ " be jury,”",
|
|
|
+ " Said",
|
|
|
+ " cunning",
|
|
|
+ " old Fury:",
|
|
|
+ " “I’ll",
|
|
|
+ " try the",
|
|
|
+ " whole",
|
|
|
+ " cause,",
|
|
|
+ " and",
|
|
|
+ " condemn",
|
|
|
+ " you",
|
|
|
+ " to",
|
|
|
+ " death.”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You are not attending!’ said the Mouse to Alice severely. ‘What are you",
|
|
|
+ "thinking of?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I beg your pardon,’ said Alice very humbly: ‘you had got to the fifth",
|
|
|
+ "bend, I think?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I had NOT!’ cried the Mouse, sharply and very angrily.",
|
|
|
+ "‘A knot!’ said Alice, always ready to make herself useful, and looking",
|
|
|
+ "anxiously about her. ‘Oh, do let me help to undo it!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I shall do nothing of the sort,’ said the Mouse, getting up and walking",
|
|
|
+ "away. ‘You insult me by talking such nonsense!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I didn’t mean it!’ pleaded poor Alice. ‘But you’re so easily offended,",
|
|
|
+ "you know!’",
|
|
|
+ "The Mouse only growled in reply.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Please come back and finish your story!’ Alice called after it; and the",
|
|
|
+ "others all joined in chorus, ‘Yes, please do!’ but the Mouse only shook",
|
|
|
+ "its head impatiently, and walked a little quicker.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What a pity it wouldn’t stay!’ sighed the Lory, as soon as it was quite",
|
|
|
+ "out of sight; and an old Crab took the opportunity of saying to her",
|
|
|
+ "daughter ‘Ah, my dear! Let this be a lesson to you never to lose",
|
|
|
+ "YOUR temper!’ ‘Hold your tongue, Ma!’ said the young Crab, a little",
|
|
|
+ "snappishly. ‘You’re enough to try the patience of an oyster!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I wish I had our Dinah here, I know I do!’ said Alice aloud, addressing",
|
|
|
+ "nobody in particular. ‘She’d soon fetch it back!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘And who is Dinah, if I might venture to ask the question?’ said the",
|
|
|
+ "Lory.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice replied eagerly, for she was always ready to talk about her pet:",
|
|
|
+ "‘Dinah’s our cat. And she’s such a capital one for catching mice you",
|
|
|
+ "can’t think! And oh, I wish you could see her after the birds! Why,",
|
|
|
+ "she’ll eat a little bird as soon as look at it!’",
|
|
|
+ "This speech caused a remarkable sensation among the party. Some of the",
|
|
|
+ "birds hurried off at once: one old Magpie began wrapping itself up very",
|
|
|
+ "carefully, remarking, ‘I really must be getting home; the night-air",
|
|
|
+ "doesn’t suit my throat!’ and a Canary called out in a trembling voice to",
|
|
|
+ "its children, ‘Come away, my dears! It’s high time you were all in bed!’",
|
|
|
+ "On various pretexts they all moved off, and Alice was soon left alone.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I wish I hadn’t mentioned Dinah!’ she said to herself in a melancholy",
|
|
|
+ "tone. ‘Nobody seems to like her, down here, and I’m sure she’s the best",
|
|
|
+ "cat in the world! Oh, my dear Dinah! I wonder if I shall ever see you",
|
|
|
+ "any more!’ And here poor Alice began to cry again, for she felt very",
|
|
|
+ "lonely and low-spirited. In a little while, however, she again heard",
|
|
|
+ "a little pattering of footsteps in the distance, and she looked up",
|
|
|
+ "eagerly, half hoping that the Mouse had changed his mind, and was coming",
|
|
|
+ "back to finish his story.",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER IV. The Rabbit Sends in a Little Bill",
|
|
|
+ "It was the White Rabbit, trotting slowly back again, and looking",
|
|
|
+ "anxiously about as it went, as if it had lost something; and she heard",
|
|
|
+ "it muttering to itself ‘The Duchess! The Duchess! Oh my dear paws! Oh",
|
|
|
+ "my fur and whiskers! She’ll get me executed, as sure as ferrets are",
|
|
|
+ "ferrets! Where CAN I have dropped them, I wonder?’ Alice guessed in a",
|
|
|
+ "moment that it was looking for the fan and the pair of white kid gloves,",
|
|
|
+ "and she very good-naturedly began hunting about for them, but they were",
|
|
|
+ "nowhere to be seen--everything seemed to have changed since her swim in",
|
|
|
+ "the pool, and the great hall, with the glass table and the little door,",
|
|
|
+ "had vanished completely.",
|
|
|
+ "Very soon the Rabbit noticed Alice, as she went hunting about, and",
|
|
|
+ "called out to her in an angry tone, ‘Why, Mary Ann, what ARE you doing",
|
|
|
+ "out here? Run home this moment, and fetch me a pair of gloves and a fan!",
|
|
|
+ "Quick, now!’ And Alice was so much frightened that she ran off at once",
|
|
|
+ "in the direction it pointed to, without trying to explain the mistake it",
|
|
|
+ "had made.",
|
|
|
+ "‘He took me for his housemaid,’ she said to herself as she ran. ‘How",
|
|
|
+ "surprised he’ll be when he finds out who I am! But I’d better take him",
|
|
|
+ "his fan and gloves--that is, if I can find them.’ As she said this, she",
|
|
|
+ "came upon a neat little house, on the door of which was a bright brass",
|
|
|
+ "plate with the name ‘W. RABBIT’ engraved upon it. She went in without",
|
|
|
+ "knocking, and hurried upstairs, in great fear lest she should meet the",
|
|
|
+ "real Mary Ann, and be turned out of the house before she had found the",
|
|
|
+ "fan and gloves.",
|
|
|
+ "‘How queer it seems,’ Alice said to herself, ‘to be going messages for",
|
|
|
+ "a rabbit! I suppose Dinah’ll be sending me on messages next!’ And she",
|
|
|
+ "began fancying the sort of thing that would happen: ‘“Miss Alice! Come",
|
|
|
+ "here directly, and get ready for your walk!” “Coming in a minute,",
|
|
|
+ "nurse! But I’ve got to see that the mouse doesn’t get out.” Only I don’t",
|
|
|
+ "think,’ Alice went on, ‘that they’d let Dinah stop in the house if it",
|
|
|
+ "began ordering people about like that!’",
|
|
|
+ "By this time she had found her way into a tidy little room with a table",
|
|
|
+ "in the window, and on it (as she had hoped) a fan and two or three pairs",
|
|
|
+ "of tiny white kid gloves: she took up the fan and a pair of the gloves,",
|
|
|
+ "and was just going to leave the room, when her eye fell upon a little",
|
|
|
+ "bottle that stood near the looking-glass. There was no label this time",
|
|
|
+ "with the words ‘DRINK ME,’ but nevertheless she uncorked it and put it",
|
|
|
+ "to her lips. ‘I know SOMETHING interesting is sure to happen,’ she said",
|
|
|
+ "to herself, ‘whenever I eat or drink anything; so I’ll just see what",
|
|
|
+ "this bottle does. I do hope it’ll make me grow large again, for really",
|
|
|
+ "I’m quite tired of being such a tiny little thing!’",
|
|
|
+ "It did so indeed, and much sooner than she had expected: before she had",
|
|
|
+ "drunk half the bottle, she found her head pressing against the ceiling,",
|
|
|
+ "and had to stoop to save her neck from being broken. She hastily put",
|
|
|
+ "down the bottle, saying to herself ‘That’s quite enough--I hope I shan’t",
|
|
|
+ "grow any more--As it is, I can’t get out at the door--I do wish I hadn’t",
|
|
|
+ "drunk quite so much!’",
|
|
|
+ "Alas! it was too late to wish that! She went on growing, and growing,",
|
|
|
+ "and very soon had to kneel down on the floor: in another minute there",
|
|
|
+ "was not even room for this, and she tried the effect of lying down with",
|
|
|
+ "one elbow against the door, and the other arm curled round her head.",
|
|
|
+ "Still she went on growing, and, as a last resource, she put one arm out",
|
|
|
+ "of the window, and one foot up the chimney, and said to herself ‘Now I",
|
|
|
+ "can do no more, whatever happens. What WILL become of me?’",
|
|
|
+ "Luckily for Alice, the little magic bottle had now had its full effect,",
|
|
|
+ "and she grew no larger: still it was very uncomfortable, and, as there",
|
|
|
+ "seemed to be no sort of chance of her ever getting out of the room",
|
|
|
+ "again, no wonder she felt unhappy.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It was much pleasanter at home,’ thought poor Alice, ‘when one wasn’t",
|
|
|
+ "always growing larger and smaller, and being ordered about by mice and",
|
|
|
+ "rabbits. I almost wish I hadn’t gone down that rabbit-hole--and yet--and",
|
|
|
+ "yet--it’s rather curious, you know, this sort of life! I do wonder what",
|
|
|
+ "CAN have happened to me! When I used to read fairy-tales, I fancied that",
|
|
|
+ "kind of thing never happened, and now here I am in the middle of one!",
|
|
|
+ "There ought to be a book written about me, that there ought! And when I",
|
|
|
+ "grow up, I’ll write one--but I’m grown up now,’ she added in a sorrowful",
|
|
|
+ "tone; ‘at least there’s no room to grow up any more HERE.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But then,’ thought Alice, ‘shall I NEVER get any older than I am",
|
|
|
+ "now? That’ll be a comfort, one way--never to be an old woman--but",
|
|
|
+ "then--always to have lessons to learn! Oh, I shouldn’t like THAT!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, you foolish Alice!’ she answered herself. ‘How can you learn",
|
|
|
+ "lessons in here? Why, there’s hardly room for YOU, and no room at all",
|
|
|
+ "for any lesson-books!’",
|
|
|
+ "And so she went on, taking first one side and then the other, and making",
|
|
|
+ "quite a conversation of it altogether; but after a few minutes she heard",
|
|
|
+ "a voice outside, and stopped to listen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Mary Ann! Mary Ann!’ said the voice. ‘Fetch me my gloves this moment!’",
|
|
|
+ "Then came a little pattering of feet on the stairs. Alice knew it was",
|
|
|
+ "the Rabbit coming to look for her, and she trembled till she shook the",
|
|
|
+ "house, quite forgetting that she was now about a thousand times as large",
|
|
|
+ "as the Rabbit, and had no reason to be afraid of it.",
|
|
|
+ "Presently the Rabbit came up to the door, and tried to open it; but, as",
|
|
|
+ "the door opened inwards, and Alice’s elbow was pressed hard against it,",
|
|
|
+ "that attempt proved a failure. Alice heard it say to itself ‘Then I’ll",
|
|
|
+ "go round and get in at the window.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘THAT you won’t’ thought Alice, and, after waiting till she fancied",
|
|
|
+ "she heard the Rabbit just under the window, she suddenly spread out her",
|
|
|
+ "hand, and made a snatch in the air. She did not get hold of anything,",
|
|
|
+ "but she heard a little shriek and a fall, and a crash of broken glass,",
|
|
|
+ "from which she concluded that it was just possible it had fallen into a",
|
|
|
+ "cucumber-frame, or something of the sort.",
|
|
|
+ "Next came an angry voice--the Rabbit’s--‘Pat! Pat! Where are you?’ And",
|
|
|
+ "then a voice she had never heard before, ‘Sure then I’m here! Digging",
|
|
|
+ "for apples, yer honour!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Digging for apples, indeed!’ said the Rabbit angrily. ‘Here! Come and",
|
|
|
+ "help me out of THIS!’ (Sounds of more broken glass.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘Now tell me, Pat, what’s that in the window?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Sure, it’s an arm, yer honour!’ (He pronounced it ‘arrum.’)",
|
|
|
+ "‘An arm, you goose! Who ever saw one that size? Why, it fills the whole",
|
|
|
+ "window!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Sure, it does, yer honour: but it’s an arm for all that.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, it’s got no business there, at any rate: go and take it away!’",
|
|
|
+ "There was a long silence after this, and Alice could only hear whispers",
|
|
|
+ "now and then; such as, ‘Sure, I don’t like it, yer honour, at all, at",
|
|
|
+ "all!’ ‘Do as I tell you, you coward!’ and at last she spread out her",
|
|
|
+ "hand again, and made another snatch in the air. This time there were",
|
|
|
+ "TWO little shrieks, and more sounds of broken glass. ‘What a number of",
|
|
|
+ "cucumber-frames there must be!’ thought Alice. ‘I wonder what they’ll do",
|
|
|
+ "next! As for pulling me out of the window, I only wish they COULD! I’m",
|
|
|
+ "sure I don’t want to stay in here any longer!’",
|
|
|
+ "She waited for some time without hearing anything more: at last came a",
|
|
|
+ "rumbling of little cartwheels, and the sound of a good many voices",
|
|
|
+ "all talking together: she made out the words: ‘Where’s the other",
|
|
|
+ "ladder?--Why, I hadn’t to bring but one; Bill’s got the other--Bill!",
|
|
|
+ "fetch it here, lad!--Here, put ‘em up at this corner--No, tie ‘em",
|
|
|
+ "together first--they don’t reach half high enough yet--Oh! they’ll",
|
|
|
+ "do well enough; don’t be particular--Here, Bill! catch hold of this",
|
|
|
+ "rope--Will the roof bear?--Mind that loose slate--Oh, it’s coming",
|
|
|
+ "down! Heads below!’ (a loud crash)--‘Now, who did that?--It was Bill, I",
|
|
|
+ "fancy--Who’s to go down the chimney?--Nay, I shan’t! YOU do it!--That I",
|
|
|
+ "won’t, then!--Bill’s to go down--Here, Bill! the master says you’re to",
|
|
|
+ "go down the chimney!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh! So Bill’s got to come down the chimney, has he?’ said Alice to",
|
|
|
+ "herself. ‘Shy, they seem to put everything upon Bill! I wouldn’t be in",
|
|
|
+ "Bill’s place for a good deal: this fireplace is narrow, to be sure; but",
|
|
|
+ "I THINK I can kick a little!’",
|
|
|
+ "She drew her foot as far down the chimney as she could, and waited",
|
|
|
+ "till she heard a little animal (she couldn’t guess of what sort it was)",
|
|
|
+ "scratching and scrambling about in the chimney close above her: then,",
|
|
|
+ "saying to herself ‘This is Bill,’ she gave one sharp kick, and waited to",
|
|
|
+ "see what would happen next.",
|
|
|
+ "The first thing she heard was a general chorus of ‘There goes Bill!’",
|
|
|
+ "then the Rabbit’s voice along--‘Catch him, you by the hedge!’ then",
|
|
|
+ "silence, and then another confusion of voices--‘Hold up his head--Brandy",
|
|
|
+ "now--Don’t choke him--How was it, old fellow? What happened to you? Tell",
|
|
|
+ "us all about it!’",
|
|
|
+ "Last came a little feeble, squeaking voice, [‘That’s Bill,’ thought",
|
|
|
+ "Alice,) ‘Well, I hardly know--No more, thank ye; I’m better now--but I’m",
|
|
|
+ "a deal too flustered to tell you--all I know is, something comes at me",
|
|
|
+ "like a Jack-in-the-box, and up I goes like a sky-rocket!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘So you did, old fellow!’ said the others.",
|
|
|
+ "‘We must burn the house down!’ said the Rabbit’s voice; and Alice called",
|
|
|
+ "out as loud as she could, ‘If you do. I’ll set Dinah at you!’",
|
|
|
+ "There was a dead silence instantly, and Alice thought to herself, ‘I",
|
|
|
+ "wonder what they WILL do next! If they had any sense, they’d take the",
|
|
|
+ "roof off.’ After a minute or two, they began moving about again, and",
|
|
|
+ "Alice heard the Rabbit say, ‘A barrowful will do, to begin with.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘A barrowful of WHAT?’ thought Alice; but she had not long to doubt,",
|
|
|
+ "for the next moment a shower of little pebbles came rattling in at the",
|
|
|
+ "window, and some of them hit her in the face. ‘I’ll put a stop to this,’",
|
|
|
+ "she said to herself, and shouted out, ‘You’d better not do that again!’",
|
|
|
+ "which produced another dead silence.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice noticed with some surprise that the pebbles were all turning into",
|
|
|
+ "little cakes as they lay on the floor, and a bright idea came into her",
|
|
|
+ "head. ‘If I eat one of these cakes,’ she thought, ‘it’s sure to make",
|
|
|
+ "SOME change in my size; and as it can’t possibly make me larger, it must",
|
|
|
+ "make me smaller, I suppose.’",
|
|
|
+ "So she swallowed one of the cakes, and was delighted to find that she",
|
|
|
+ "began shrinking directly. As soon as she was small enough to get through",
|
|
|
+ "the door, she ran out of the house, and found quite a crowd of little",
|
|
|
+ "animals and birds waiting outside. The poor little Lizard, Bill, was",
|
|
|
+ "in the middle, being held up by two guinea-pigs, who were giving it",
|
|
|
+ "something out of a bottle. They all made a rush at Alice the moment she",
|
|
|
+ "appeared; but she ran off as hard as she could, and soon found herself",
|
|
|
+ "safe in a thick wood.",
|
|
|
+ "‘The first thing I’ve got to do,’ said Alice to herself, as she wandered",
|
|
|
+ "about in the wood, ‘is to grow to my right size again; and the second",
|
|
|
+ "thing is to find my way into that lovely garden. I think that will be",
|
|
|
+ "the best plan.’",
|
|
|
+ "It sounded an excellent plan, no doubt, and very neatly and simply",
|
|
|
+ "arranged; the only difficulty was, that she had not the smallest idea",
|
|
|
+ "how to set about it; and while she was peering about anxiously among",
|
|
|
+ "the trees, a little sharp bark just over her head made her look up in a",
|
|
|
+ "great hurry.",
|
|
|
+ "An enormous puppy was looking down at her with large round eyes, and",
|
|
|
+ "feebly stretching out one paw, trying to touch her. ‘Poor little thing!’",
|
|
|
+ "said Alice, in a coaxing tone, and she tried hard to whistle to it; but",
|
|
|
+ "she was terribly frightened all the time at the thought that it might be",
|
|
|
+ "hungry, in which case it would be very likely to eat her up in spite of",
|
|
|
+ "all her coaxing.",
|
|
|
+ "Hardly knowing what she did, she picked up a little bit of stick, and",
|
|
|
+ "held it out to the puppy; whereupon the puppy jumped into the air off",
|
|
|
+ "all its feet at once, with a yelp of delight, and rushed at the stick,",
|
|
|
+ "and made believe to worry it; then Alice dodged behind a great thistle,",
|
|
|
+ "to keep herself from being run over; and the moment she appeared on the",
|
|
|
+ "other side, the puppy made another rush at the stick, and tumbled head",
|
|
|
+ "over heels in its hurry to get hold of it; then Alice, thinking it was",
|
|
|
+ "very like having a game of play with a cart-horse, and expecting every",
|
|
|
+ "moment to be trampled under its feet, ran round the thistle again; then",
|
|
|
+ "the puppy began a series of short charges at the stick, running a very",
|
|
|
+ "little way forwards each time and a long way back, and barking hoarsely",
|
|
|
+ "all the while, till at last it sat down a good way off, panting, with",
|
|
|
+ "its tongue hanging out of its mouth, and its great eyes half shut.",
|
|
|
+ "This seemed to Alice a good opportunity for making her escape; so she",
|
|
|
+ "set off at once, and ran till she was quite tired and out of breath, and",
|
|
|
+ "till the puppy’s bark sounded quite faint in the distance.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And yet what a dear little puppy it was!’ said Alice, as she leant",
|
|
|
+ "against a buttercup to rest herself, and fanned herself with one of the",
|
|
|
+ "leaves: ‘I should have liked teaching it tricks very much, if--if I’d",
|
|
|
+ "only been the right size to do it! Oh dear! I’d nearly forgotten that",
|
|
|
+ "I’ve got to grow up again! Let me see--how IS it to be managed? I",
|
|
|
+ "suppose I ought to eat or drink something or other; but the great",
|
|
|
+ "question is, what?’",
|
|
|
+ "The great question certainly was, what? Alice looked all round her at",
|
|
|
+ "the flowers and the blades of grass, but she did not see anything that",
|
|
|
+ "looked like the right thing to eat or drink under the circumstances.",
|
|
|
+ "There was a large mushroom growing near her, about the same height as",
|
|
|
+ "herself; and when she had looked under it, and on both sides of it, and",
|
|
|
+ "behind it, it occurred to her that she might as well look and see what",
|
|
|
+ "was on the top of it.",
|
|
|
+ "She stretched herself up on tiptoe, and peeped over the edge of the",
|
|
|
+ "mushroom, and her eyes immediately met those of a large caterpillar,",
|
|
|
+ "that was sitting on the top with its arms folded, quietly smoking a long",
|
|
|
+ "hookah, and taking not the smallest notice of her or of anything else.",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER V. Advice from a Caterpillar",
|
|
|
+ "The Caterpillar and Alice looked at each other for some time in silence:",
|
|
|
+ "at last the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth, and addressed",
|
|
|
+ "her in a languid, sleepy voice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Who are YOU?’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation. Alice replied,",
|
|
|
+ "rather shyly, ‘I--I hardly know, sir, just at present--at least I know",
|
|
|
+ "who I WAS when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been",
|
|
|
+ "changed several times since then.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What do you mean by that?’ said the Caterpillar sternly. ‘Explain",
|
|
|
+ "yourself!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I can’t explain MYSELF, I’m afraid, sir’ said Alice, ‘because I’m not",
|
|
|
+ "myself, you see.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t see,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m afraid I can’t put it more clearly,’ Alice replied very politely,",
|
|
|
+ "‘for I can’t understand it myself to begin with; and being so many",
|
|
|
+ "different sizes in a day is very confusing.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It isn’t,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, perhaps you haven’t found it so yet,’ said Alice; ‘but when you",
|
|
|
+ "have to turn into a chrysalis--you will some day, you know--and then",
|
|
|
+ "after that into a butterfly, I should think you’ll feel it a little",
|
|
|
+ "queer, won’t you?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not a bit,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, perhaps your feelings may be different,’ said Alice; ‘all I know",
|
|
|
+ "is, it would feel very queer to ME.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You!’ said the Caterpillar contemptuously. ‘Who are YOU?’",
|
|
|
+ "Which brought them back again to the beginning of the conversation.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice felt a little irritated at the Caterpillar’s making such VERY",
|
|
|
+ "short remarks, and she drew herself up and said, very gravely, ‘I think,",
|
|
|
+ "you ought to tell me who YOU are, first.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why?’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "Here was another puzzling question; and as Alice could not think of any",
|
|
|
+ "good reason, and as the Caterpillar seemed to be in a VERY unpleasant",
|
|
|
+ "state of mind, she turned away.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come back!’ the Caterpillar called after her. ‘I’ve something important",
|
|
|
+ "to say!’",
|
|
|
+ "This sounded promising, certainly: Alice turned and came back again.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Keep your temper,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Is that all?’ said Alice, swallowing down her anger as well as she",
|
|
|
+ "could.",
|
|
|
+ "‘No,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice thought she might as well wait, as she had nothing else to do, and",
|
|
|
+ "perhaps after all it might tell her something worth hearing. For some",
|
|
|
+ "minutes it puffed away without speaking, but at last it unfolded its",
|
|
|
+ "arms, took the hookah out of its mouth again, and said, ‘So you think",
|
|
|
+ "you’re changed, do you?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m afraid I am, sir,’ said Alice; ‘I can’t remember things as I",
|
|
|
+ "used--and I don’t keep the same size for ten minutes together!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Can’t remember WHAT things?’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, I’ve tried to say “HOW DOTH THE LITTLE BUSY BEE,” but it all came",
|
|
|
+ "different!’ Alice replied in a very melancholy voice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Repeat, “YOU ARE OLD, FATHER WILLIAM,”’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice folded her hands, and began:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘You are old, Father William,’ the young man said,",
|
|
|
+ " ‘And your hair has become very white;",
|
|
|
+ " And yet you incessantly stand on your head--",
|
|
|
+ " Do you think, at your age, it is right?’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘In my youth,’ Father William replied to his son,",
|
|
|
+ " ‘I feared it might injure the brain;",
|
|
|
+ " But, now that I’m perfectly sure I have none,",
|
|
|
+ " Why, I do it again and again.’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘You are old,’ said the youth, ‘as I mentioned before,",
|
|
|
+ " And have grown most uncommonly fat;",
|
|
|
+ " Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door--",
|
|
|
+ " Pray, what is the reason of that?’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘In my youth,’ said the sage, as he shook his grey locks,",
|
|
|
+ " ‘I kept all my limbs very supple",
|
|
|
+ " By the use of this ointment--one shilling the box--",
|
|
|
+ " Allow me to sell you a couple?’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘You are old,’ said the youth, ‘and your jaws are too weak",
|
|
|
+ " For anything tougher than suet;",
|
|
|
+ " Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak--",
|
|
|
+ " Pray how did you manage to do it?’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘In my youth,’ said his father, ‘I took to the law,",
|
|
|
+ " And argued each case with my wife;",
|
|
|
+ " And the muscular strength, which it gave to my jaw,",
|
|
|
+ " Has lasted the rest of my life.’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘You are old,’ said the youth, ‘one would hardly suppose",
|
|
|
+ " That your eye was as steady as ever;",
|
|
|
+ " Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose--",
|
|
|
+ " What made you so awfully clever?’",
|
|
|
+ " ‘I have answered three questions, and that is enough,’",
|
|
|
+ " Said his father; ‘don’t give yourself airs!",
|
|
|
+ " Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?",
|
|
|
+ " Be off, or I’ll kick you down stairs!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘That is not said right,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not QUITE right, I’m afraid,’ said Alice, timidly; ‘some of the words",
|
|
|
+ "have got altered.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It is wrong from beginning to end,’ said the Caterpillar decidedly, and",
|
|
|
+ "there was silence for some minutes.",
|
|
|
+ "The Caterpillar was the first to speak.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What size do you want to be?’ it asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, I’m not particular as to size,’ Alice hastily replied; ‘only one",
|
|
|
+ "doesn’t like changing so often, you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I DON’T know,’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice said nothing: she had never been so much contradicted in her life",
|
|
|
+ "before, and she felt that she was losing her temper.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Are you content now?’ said the Caterpillar.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, I should like to be a LITTLE larger, sir, if you wouldn’t mind,’",
|
|
|
+ "said Alice: ‘three inches is such a wretched height to be.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It is a very good height indeed!’ said the Caterpillar angrily, rearing",
|
|
|
+ "itself upright as it spoke (it was exactly three inches high).",
|
|
|
+ "‘But I’m not used to it!’ pleaded poor Alice in a piteous tone. And",
|
|
|
+ "she thought of herself, ‘I wish the creatures wouldn’t be so easily",
|
|
|
+ "offended!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You’ll get used to it in time,’ said the Caterpillar; and it put the",
|
|
|
+ "hookah into its mouth and began smoking again.",
|
|
|
+ "This time Alice waited patiently until it chose to speak again. In",
|
|
|
+ "a minute or two the Caterpillar took the hookah out of its mouth",
|
|
|
+ "and yawned once or twice, and shook itself. Then it got down off the",
|
|
|
+ "mushroom, and crawled away in the grass, merely remarking as it went,",
|
|
|
+ "‘One side will make you grow taller, and the other side will make you",
|
|
|
+ "grow shorter.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘One side of WHAT? The other side of WHAT?’ thought Alice to herself.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of the mushroom,’ said the Caterpillar, just as if she had asked it",
|
|
|
+ "aloud; and in another moment it was out of sight.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice remained looking thoughtfully at the mushroom for a minute, trying",
|
|
|
+ "to make out which were the two sides of it; and as it was perfectly",
|
|
|
+ "round, she found this a very difficult question. However, at last she",
|
|
|
+ "stretched her arms round it as far as they would go, and broke off a bit",
|
|
|
+ "of the edge with each hand.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And now which is which?’ she said to herself, and nibbled a little of",
|
|
|
+ "the right-hand bit to try the effect: the next moment she felt a violent",
|
|
|
+ "blow underneath her chin: it had struck her foot!",
|
|
|
+ "She was a good deal frightened by this very sudden change, but she felt",
|
|
|
+ "that there was no time to be lost, as she was shrinking rapidly; so she",
|
|
|
+ "set to work at once to eat some of the other bit. Her chin was pressed",
|
|
|
+ "so closely against her foot, that there was hardly room to open her",
|
|
|
+ "mouth; but she did it at last, and managed to swallow a morsel of the",
|
|
|
+ "lefthand bit.",
|
|
|
+ " * * * * * * *",
|
|
|
+ " * * * * * *",
|
|
|
+ " * * * * * * *",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come, my head’s free at last!’ said Alice in a tone of delight, which",
|
|
|
+ "changed into alarm in another moment, when she found that her shoulders",
|
|
|
+ "were nowhere to be found: all she could see, when she looked down, was",
|
|
|
+ "an immense length of neck, which seemed to rise like a stalk out of a",
|
|
|
+ "sea of green leaves that lay far below her.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What CAN all that green stuff be?’ said Alice. ‘And where HAVE my",
|
|
|
+ "shoulders got to? And oh, my poor hands, how is it I can’t see you?’",
|
|
|
+ "She was moving them about as she spoke, but no result seemed to follow,",
|
|
|
+ "except a little shaking among the distant green leaves.",
|
|
|
+ "As there seemed to be no chance of getting her hands up to her head, she",
|
|
|
+ "tried to get her head down to them, and was delighted to find that her",
|
|
|
+ "neck would bend about easily in any direction, like a serpent. She had",
|
|
|
+ "just succeeded in curving it down into a graceful zigzag, and was going",
|
|
|
+ "to dive in among the leaves, which she found to be nothing but the tops",
|
|
|
+ "of the trees under which she had been wandering, when a sharp hiss made",
|
|
|
+ "her draw back in a hurry: a large pigeon had flown into her face, and",
|
|
|
+ "was beating her violently with its wings.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Serpent!’ screamed the Pigeon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m NOT a serpent!’ said Alice indignantly. ‘Let me alone!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Serpent, I say again!’ repeated the Pigeon, but in a more subdued tone,",
|
|
|
+ "and added with a kind of sob, ‘I’ve tried every way, and nothing seems",
|
|
|
+ "to suit them!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I haven’t the least idea what you’re talking about,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’ve tried the roots of trees, and I’ve tried banks, and I’ve tried",
|
|
|
+ "hedges,’ the Pigeon went on, without attending to her; ‘but those",
|
|
|
+ "serpents! There’s no pleasing them!’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was more and more puzzled, but she thought there was no use in",
|
|
|
+ "saying anything more till the Pigeon had finished.",
|
|
|
+ "‘As if it wasn’t trouble enough hatching the eggs,’ said the Pigeon;",
|
|
|
+ "‘but I must be on the look-out for serpents night and day! Why, I",
|
|
|
+ "haven’t had a wink of sleep these three weeks!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m very sorry you’ve been annoyed,’ said Alice, who was beginning to",
|
|
|
+ "see its meaning.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And just as I’d taken the highest tree in the wood,’ continued the",
|
|
|
+ "Pigeon, raising its voice to a shriek, ‘and just as I was thinking I",
|
|
|
+ "should be free of them at last, they must needs come wriggling down from",
|
|
|
+ "the sky! Ugh, Serpent!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But I’m NOT a serpent, I tell you!’ said Alice. ‘I’m a--I’m a--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well! WHAT are you?’ said the Pigeon. ‘I can see you’re trying to",
|
|
|
+ "invent something!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I--I’m a little girl,’ said Alice, rather doubtfully, as she remembered",
|
|
|
+ "the number of changes she had gone through that day.",
|
|
|
+ "‘A likely story indeed!’ said the Pigeon in a tone of the deepest",
|
|
|
+ "contempt. ‘I’ve seen a good many little girls in my time, but never ONE",
|
|
|
+ "with such a neck as that! No, no! You’re a serpent; and there’s no use",
|
|
|
+ "denying it. I suppose you’ll be telling me next that you never tasted an",
|
|
|
+ "egg!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I HAVE tasted eggs, certainly,’ said Alice, who was a very truthful",
|
|
|
+ "child; ‘but little girls eat eggs quite as much as serpents do, you",
|
|
|
+ "know.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t believe it,’ said the Pigeon; ‘but if they do, why then they’re",
|
|
|
+ "a kind of serpent, that’s all I can say.’",
|
|
|
+ "This was such a new idea to Alice, that she was quite silent for a",
|
|
|
+ "minute or two, which gave the Pigeon the opportunity of adding, ‘You’re",
|
|
|
+ "looking for eggs, I know THAT well enough; and what does it matter to me",
|
|
|
+ "whether you’re a little girl or a serpent?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It matters a good deal to ME,’ said Alice hastily; ‘but I’m not looking",
|
|
|
+ "for eggs, as it happens; and if I was, I shouldn’t want YOURS: I don’t",
|
|
|
+ "like them raw.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, be off, then!’ said the Pigeon in a sulky tone, as it settled",
|
|
|
+ "down again into its nest. Alice crouched down among the trees as well as",
|
|
|
+ "she could, for her neck kept getting entangled among the branches, and",
|
|
|
+ "every now and then she had to stop and untwist it. After a while she",
|
|
|
+ "remembered that she still held the pieces of mushroom in her hands, and",
|
|
|
+ "she set to work very carefully, nibbling first at one and then at the",
|
|
|
+ "other, and growing sometimes taller and sometimes shorter, until she had",
|
|
|
+ "succeeded in bringing herself down to her usual height.",
|
|
|
+ "It was so long since she had been anything near the right size, that it",
|
|
|
+ "felt quite strange at first; but she got used to it in a few minutes,",
|
|
|
+ "and began talking to herself, as usual. ‘Come, there’s half my plan done",
|
|
|
+ "now! How puzzling all these changes are! I’m never sure what I’m going",
|
|
|
+ "to be, from one minute to another! However, I’ve got back to my right",
|
|
|
+ "size: the next thing is, to get into that beautiful garden--how IS that",
|
|
|
+ "to be done, I wonder?’ As she said this, she came suddenly upon an open",
|
|
|
+ "place, with a little house in it about four feet high. ‘Whoever lives",
|
|
|
+ "there,’ thought Alice, ‘it’ll never do to come upon them THIS size: why,",
|
|
|
+ "I should frighten them out of their wits!’ So she began nibbling at the",
|
|
|
+ "righthand bit again, and did not venture to go near the house till she",
|
|
|
+ "had brought herself down to nine inches high.",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER VI. Pig and Pepper",
|
|
|
+ "For a minute or two she stood looking at the house, and wondering what",
|
|
|
+ "to do next, when suddenly a footman in livery came running out of the",
|
|
|
+ "wood--(she considered him to be a footman because he was in livery:",
|
|
|
+ "otherwise, judging by his face only, she would have called him a",
|
|
|
+ "fish)--and rapped loudly at the door with his knuckles. It was opened",
|
|
|
+ "by another footman in livery, with a round face, and large eyes like a",
|
|
|
+ "frog; and both footmen, Alice noticed, had powdered hair that curled all",
|
|
|
+ "over their heads. She felt very curious to know what it was all about,",
|
|
|
+ "and crept a little way out of the wood to listen.",
|
|
|
+ "The Fish-Footman began by producing from under his arm a great letter,",
|
|
|
+ "nearly as large as himself, and this he handed over to the other,",
|
|
|
+ "saying, in a solemn tone, ‘For the Duchess. An invitation from the Queen",
|
|
|
+ "to play croquet.’ The Frog-Footman repeated, in the same solemn tone,",
|
|
|
+ "only changing the order of the words a little, ‘From the Queen. An",
|
|
|
+ "invitation for the Duchess to play croquet.’",
|
|
|
+ "Then they both bowed low, and their curls got entangled together.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice laughed so much at this, that she had to run back into the",
|
|
|
+ "wood for fear of their hearing her; and when she next peeped out the",
|
|
|
+ "Fish-Footman was gone, and the other was sitting on the ground near the",
|
|
|
+ "door, staring stupidly up into the sky.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice went timidly up to the door, and knocked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘There’s no sort of use in knocking,’ said the Footman, ‘and that for",
|
|
|
+ "two reasons. First, because I’m on the same side of the door as you",
|
|
|
+ "are; secondly, because they’re making such a noise inside, no one could",
|
|
|
+ "possibly hear you.’ And certainly there was a most extraordinary noise",
|
|
|
+ "going on within--a constant howling and sneezing, and every now and then",
|
|
|
+ "a great crash, as if a dish or kettle had been broken to pieces.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Please, then,’ said Alice, ‘how am I to get in?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘There might be some sense in your knocking,’ the Footman went on",
|
|
|
+ "without attending to her, ‘if we had the door between us. For instance,",
|
|
|
+ "if you were INSIDE, you might knock, and I could let you out, you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "He was looking up into the sky all the time he was speaking, and this",
|
|
|
+ "Alice thought decidedly uncivil. ‘But perhaps he can’t help it,’ she",
|
|
|
+ "said to herself; ‘his eyes are so VERY nearly at the top of his head.",
|
|
|
+ "But at any rate he might answer questions.--How am I to get in?’ she",
|
|
|
+ "repeated, aloud.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I shall sit here,’ the Footman remarked, ‘till tomorrow--’",
|
|
|
+ "At this moment the door of the house opened, and a large plate came",
|
|
|
+ "skimming out, straight at the Footman’s head: it just grazed his nose,",
|
|
|
+ "and broke to pieces against one of the trees behind him.",
|
|
|
+ "‘--or next day, maybe,’ the Footman continued in the same tone, exactly",
|
|
|
+ "as if nothing had happened.",
|
|
|
+ "‘How am I to get in?’ asked Alice again, in a louder tone.",
|
|
|
+ "‘ARE you to get in at all?’ said the Footman. ‘That’s the first",
|
|
|
+ "question, you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "It was, no doubt: only Alice did not like to be told so. ‘It’s really",
|
|
|
+ "dreadful,’ she muttered to herself, ‘the way all the creatures argue.",
|
|
|
+ "It’s enough to drive one crazy!’",
|
|
|
+ "The Footman seemed to think this a good opportunity for repeating his",
|
|
|
+ "remark, with variations. ‘I shall sit here,’ he said, ‘on and off, for",
|
|
|
+ "days and days.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But what am I to do?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Anything you like,’ said the Footman, and began whistling.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, there’s no use in talking to him,’ said Alice desperately: ‘he’s",
|
|
|
+ "perfectly idiotic!’ And she opened the door and went in.",
|
|
|
+ "The door led right into a large kitchen, which was full of smoke from",
|
|
|
+ "one end to the other: the Duchess was sitting on a three-legged stool in",
|
|
|
+ "the middle, nursing a baby; the cook was leaning over the fire, stirring",
|
|
|
+ "a large cauldron which seemed to be full of soup.",
|
|
|
+ "‘There’s certainly too much pepper in that soup!’ Alice said to herself,",
|
|
|
+ "as well as she could for sneezing.",
|
|
|
+ "There was certainly too much of it in the air. Even the Duchess",
|
|
|
+ "sneezed occasionally; and as for the baby, it was sneezing and howling",
|
|
|
+ "alternately without a moment’s pause. The only things in the kitchen",
|
|
|
+ "that did not sneeze, were the cook, and a large cat which was sitting on",
|
|
|
+ "the hearth and grinning from ear to ear.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Please would you tell me,’ said Alice, a little timidly, for she was",
|
|
|
+ "not quite sure whether it was good manners for her to speak first, ‘why",
|
|
|
+ "your cat grins like that?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s a Cheshire cat,’ said the Duchess, ‘and that’s why. Pig!’",
|
|
|
+ "She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite",
|
|
|
+ "jumped; but she saw in another moment that it was addressed to the baby,",
|
|
|
+ "and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:--",
|
|
|
+ "‘I didn’t know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn’t know",
|
|
|
+ "that cats COULD grin.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘They all can,’ said the Duchess; ‘and most of ‘em do.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t know of any that do,’ Alice said very politely, feeling quite",
|
|
|
+ "pleased to have got into a conversation.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You don’t know much,’ said the Duchess; ‘and that’s a fact.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark, and thought it would",
|
|
|
+ "be as well to introduce some other subject of conversation. While she",
|
|
|
+ "was trying to fix on one, the cook took the cauldron of soup off the",
|
|
|
+ "fire, and at once set to work throwing everything within her reach at",
|
|
|
+ "the Duchess and the baby--the fire-irons came first; then followed a",
|
|
|
+ "shower of saucepans, plates, and dishes. The Duchess took no notice of",
|
|
|
+ "them even when they hit her; and the baby was howling so much already,",
|
|
|
+ "that it was quite impossible to say whether the blows hurt it or not.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, PLEASE mind what you’re doing!’ cried Alice, jumping up and down in",
|
|
|
+ "an agony of terror. ‘Oh, there goes his PRECIOUS nose’; as an unusually",
|
|
|
+ "large saucepan flew close by it, and very nearly carried it off.",
|
|
|
+ "‘If everybody minded their own business,’ the Duchess said in a hoarse",
|
|
|
+ "growl, ‘the world would go round a deal faster than it does.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Which would NOT be an advantage,’ said Alice, who felt very glad to get",
|
|
|
+ "an opportunity of showing off a little of her knowledge. ‘Just think of",
|
|
|
+ "what work it would make with the day and night! You see the earth takes",
|
|
|
+ "twenty-four hours to turn round on its axis--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Talking of axes,’ said the Duchess, ‘chop off her head!’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook, to see if she meant to take",
|
|
|
+ "the hint; but the cook was busily stirring the soup, and seemed not to",
|
|
|
+ "be listening, so she went on again: ‘Twenty-four hours, I THINK; or is",
|
|
|
+ "it twelve? I--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, don’t bother ME,’ said the Duchess; ‘I never could abide figures!’",
|
|
|
+ "And with that she began nursing her child again, singing a sort of",
|
|
|
+ "lullaby to it as she did so, and giving it a violent shake at the end of",
|
|
|
+ "every line:",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Speak roughly to your little boy,",
|
|
|
+ " And beat him when he sneezes:",
|
|
|
+ " He only does it to annoy,",
|
|
|
+ " Because he knows it teases.’",
|
|
|
+ " CHORUS.",
|
|
|
+ " (In which the cook and the baby joined):--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Wow! wow! wow!’",
|
|
|
+ "While the Duchess sang the second verse of the song, she kept tossing",
|
|
|
+ "the baby violently up and down, and the poor little thing howled so,",
|
|
|
+ "that Alice could hardly hear the words:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘I speak severely to my boy,",
|
|
|
+ " I beat him when he sneezes;",
|
|
|
+ " For he can thoroughly enjoy",
|
|
|
+ " The pepper when he pleases!’",
|
|
|
+ " CHORUS.",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Wow! wow! wow!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Here! you may nurse it a bit, if you like!’ the Duchess said to Alice,",
|
|
|
+ "flinging the baby at her as she spoke. ‘I must go and get ready to play",
|
|
|
+ "croquet with the Queen,’ and she hurried out of the room. The cook threw",
|
|
|
+ "a frying-pan after her as she went out, but it just missed her.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice caught the baby with some difficulty, as it was a queer-shaped",
|
|
|
+ "little creature, and held out its arms and legs in all directions, ‘just",
|
|
|
+ "like a star-fish,’ thought Alice. The poor little thing was snorting",
|
|
|
+ "like a steam-engine when she caught it, and kept doubling itself up and",
|
|
|
+ "straightening itself out again, so that altogether, for the first minute",
|
|
|
+ "or two, it was as much as she could do to hold it.",
|
|
|
+ "As soon as she had made out the proper way of nursing it, (which was to",
|
|
|
+ "twist it up into a sort of knot, and then keep tight hold of its right",
|
|
|
+ "ear and left foot, so as to prevent its undoing itself,) she carried",
|
|
|
+ "it out into the open air. ‘IF I don’t take this child away with me,’",
|
|
|
+ "thought Alice, ‘they’re sure to kill it in a day or two: wouldn’t it be",
|
|
|
+ "murder to leave it behind?’ She said the last words out loud, and the",
|
|
|
+ "little thing grunted in reply (it had left off sneezing by this time).",
|
|
|
+ "‘Don’t grunt,’ said Alice; ‘that’s not at all a proper way of expressing",
|
|
|
+ "yourself.’",
|
|
|
+ "The baby grunted again, and Alice looked very anxiously into its face to",
|
|
|
+ "see what was the matter with it. There could be no doubt that it had",
|
|
|
+ "a VERY turn-up nose, much more like a snout than a real nose; also its",
|
|
|
+ "eyes were getting extremely small for a baby: altogether Alice did not",
|
|
|
+ "like the look of the thing at all. ‘But perhaps it was only sobbing,’",
|
|
|
+ "she thought, and looked into its eyes again, to see if there were any",
|
|
|
+ "tears.",
|
|
|
+ "No, there were no tears. ‘If you’re going to turn into a pig, my dear,’",
|
|
|
+ "said Alice, seriously, ‘I’ll have nothing more to do with you. Mind",
|
|
|
+ "now!’ The poor little thing sobbed again (or grunted, it was impossible",
|
|
|
+ "to say which), and they went on for some while in silence.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was just beginning to think to herself, ‘Now, what am I to do with",
|
|
|
+ "this creature when I get it home?’ when it grunted again, so violently,",
|
|
|
+ "that she looked down into its face in some alarm. This time there could",
|
|
|
+ "be NO mistake about it: it was neither more nor less than a pig, and she",
|
|
|
+ "felt that it would be quite absurd for her to carry it further.",
|
|
|
+ "So she set the little creature down, and felt quite relieved to see",
|
|
|
+ "it trot away quietly into the wood. ‘If it had grown up,’ she said",
|
|
|
+ "to herself, ‘it would have made a dreadfully ugly child: but it makes",
|
|
|
+ "rather a handsome pig, I think.’ And she began thinking over other",
|
|
|
+ "children she knew, who might do very well as pigs, and was just saying",
|
|
|
+ "to herself, ‘if one only knew the right way to change them--’ when she",
|
|
|
+ "was a little startled by seeing the Cheshire Cat sitting on a bough of a",
|
|
|
+ "tree a few yards off.",
|
|
|
+ "The Cat only grinned when it saw Alice. It looked good-natured, she",
|
|
|
+ "thought: still it had VERY long claws and a great many teeth, so she",
|
|
|
+ "felt that it ought to be treated with respect.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Cheshire Puss,’ she began, rather timidly, as she did not at all know",
|
|
|
+ "whether it would like the name: however, it only grinned a little wider.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come, it’s pleased so far,’ thought Alice, and she went on. ‘Would you",
|
|
|
+ "tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,’ said the Cat.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t much care where--’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,’ said the Cat.",
|
|
|
+ "‘--so long as I get SOMEWHERE,’ Alice added as an explanation.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, you’re sure to do that,’ said the Cat, ‘if you only walk long",
|
|
|
+ "enough.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice felt that this could not be denied, so she tried another question.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What sort of people live about here?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘In THAT direction,’ the Cat said, waving its right paw round, ‘lives",
|
|
|
+ "a Hatter: and in THAT direction,’ waving the other paw, ‘lives a March",
|
|
|
+ "Hare. Visit either you like: they’re both mad.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But I don’t want to go among mad people,’ Alice remarked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, you can’t help that,’ said the Cat: ‘we’re all mad here. I’m mad.",
|
|
|
+ "You’re mad.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘How do you know I’m mad?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You must be,’ said the Cat, ‘or you wouldn’t have come here.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice didn’t think that proved it at all; however, she went on ‘And how",
|
|
|
+ "do you know that you’re mad?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘To begin with,’ said the Cat, ‘a dog’s not mad. You grant that?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I suppose so,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, then,’ the Cat went on, ‘you see, a dog growls when it’s angry,",
|
|
|
+ "and wags its tail when it’s pleased. Now I growl when I’m pleased, and",
|
|
|
+ "wag my tail when I’m angry. Therefore I’m mad.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I call it purring, not growling,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Call it what you like,’ said the Cat. ‘Do you play croquet with the",
|
|
|
+ "Queen to-day?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I should like it very much,’ said Alice, ‘but I haven’t been invited",
|
|
|
+ "yet.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You’ll see me there,’ said the Cat, and vanished.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was not much surprised at this, she was getting so used to queer",
|
|
|
+ "things happening. While she was looking at the place where it had been,",
|
|
|
+ "it suddenly appeared again.",
|
|
|
+ "‘By-the-bye, what became of the baby?’ said the Cat. ‘I’d nearly",
|
|
|
+ "forgotten to ask.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It turned into a pig,’ Alice quietly said, just as if it had come back",
|
|
|
+ "in a natural way.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I thought it would,’ said the Cat, and vanished again.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice waited a little, half expecting to see it again, but it did not",
|
|
|
+ "appear, and after a minute or two she walked on in the direction in",
|
|
|
+ "which the March Hare was said to live. ‘I’ve seen hatters before,’ she",
|
|
|
+ "said to herself; ‘the March Hare will be much the most interesting, and",
|
|
|
+ "perhaps as this is May it won’t be raving mad--at least not so mad as",
|
|
|
+ "it was in March.’ As she said this, she looked up, and there was the Cat",
|
|
|
+ "again, sitting on a branch of a tree.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Did you say pig, or fig?’ said the Cat.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I said pig,’ replied Alice; ‘and I wish you wouldn’t keep appearing and",
|
|
|
+ "vanishing so suddenly: you make one quite giddy.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘All right,’ said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly,",
|
|
|
+ "beginning with the end of the tail, and ending with the grin, which",
|
|
|
+ "remained some time after the rest of it had gone.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well! I’ve often seen a cat without a grin,’ thought Alice; ‘but a grin",
|
|
|
+ "without a cat! It’s the most curious thing I ever saw in my life!’",
|
|
|
+ "She had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the house",
|
|
|
+ "of the March Hare: she thought it must be the right house, because the",
|
|
|
+ "chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was thatched with fur. It",
|
|
|
+ "was so large a house, that she did not like to go nearer till she had",
|
|
|
+ "nibbled some more of the lefthand bit of mushroom, and raised herself to",
|
|
|
+ "about two feet high: even then she walked up towards it rather timidly,",
|
|
|
+ "saying to herself ‘Suppose it should be raving mad after all! I almost",
|
|
|
+ "wish I’d gone to see the Hatter instead!’",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER VII. A Mad Tea-Party",
|
|
|
+ "There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, and the",
|
|
|
+ "March Hare and the Hatter were having tea at it: a Dormouse was sitting",
|
|
|
+ "between them, fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a",
|
|
|
+ "cushion, resting their elbows on it, and talking over its head. ‘Very",
|
|
|
+ "uncomfortable for the Dormouse,’ thought Alice; ‘only, as it’s asleep, I",
|
|
|
+ "suppose it doesn’t mind.’",
|
|
|
+ "The table was a large one, but the three were all crowded together at",
|
|
|
+ "one corner of it: ‘No room! No room!’ they cried out when they saw Alice",
|
|
|
+ "coming. ‘There’s PLENTY of room!’ said Alice indignantly, and she sat",
|
|
|
+ "down in a large arm-chair at one end of the table.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Have some wine,’ the March Hare said in an encouraging tone.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it but tea.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t see any wine,’ she remarked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘There isn’t any,’ said the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then it wasn’t very civil of you to offer it,’ said Alice angrily.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It wasn’t very civil of you to sit down without being invited,’ said",
|
|
|
+ "the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I didn’t know it was YOUR table,’ said Alice; ‘it’s laid for a great",
|
|
|
+ "many more than three.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Your hair wants cutting,’ said the Hatter. He had been looking at Alice",
|
|
|
+ "for some time with great curiosity, and this was his first speech.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You should learn not to make personal remarks,’ Alice said with some",
|
|
|
+ "severity; ‘it’s very rude.’",
|
|
|
+ "The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this; but all he SAID",
|
|
|
+ "was, ‘Why is a raven like a writing-desk?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come, we shall have some fun now!’ thought Alice. ‘I’m glad they’ve",
|
|
|
+ "begun asking riddles.--I believe I can guess that,’ she added aloud.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Do you mean that you think you can find out the answer to it?’ said the",
|
|
|
+ "March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Exactly so,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then you should say what you mean,’ the March Hare went on.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I do,’ Alice hastily replied; ‘at least--at least I mean what I",
|
|
|
+ "say--that’s the same thing, you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not the same thing a bit!’ said the Hatter. ‘You might just as well say",
|
|
|
+ "that “I see what I eat” is the same thing as “I eat what I see”!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You might just as well say,’ added the March Hare, ‘that “I like what I",
|
|
|
+ "get” is the same thing as “I get what I like”!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You might just as well say,’ added the Dormouse, who seemed to be",
|
|
|
+ "talking in his sleep, ‘that “I breathe when I sleep” is the same thing",
|
|
|
+ "as “I sleep when I breathe”!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It IS the same thing with you,’ said the Hatter, and here the",
|
|
|
+ "conversation dropped, and the party sat silent for a minute, while Alice",
|
|
|
+ "thought over all she could remember about ravens and writing-desks,",
|
|
|
+ "which wasn’t much.",
|
|
|
+ "The Hatter was the first to break the silence. ‘What day of the month",
|
|
|
+ "is it?’ he said, turning to Alice: he had taken his watch out of his",
|
|
|
+ "pocket, and was looking at it uneasily, shaking it every now and then,",
|
|
|
+ "and holding it to his ear.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice considered a little, and then said ‘The fourth.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Two days wrong!’ sighed the Hatter. ‘I told you butter wouldn’t suit",
|
|
|
+ "the works!’ he added looking angrily at the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It was the BEST butter,’ the March Hare meekly replied.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, but some crumbs must have got in as well,’ the Hatter grumbled:",
|
|
|
+ "‘you shouldn’t have put it in with the bread-knife.’",
|
|
|
+ "The March Hare took the watch and looked at it gloomily: then he dipped",
|
|
|
+ "it into his cup of tea, and looked at it again: but he could think of",
|
|
|
+ "nothing better to say than his first remark, ‘It was the BEST butter,",
|
|
|
+ "you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice had been looking over his shoulder with some curiosity. ‘What a",
|
|
|
+ "funny watch!’ she remarked. ‘It tells the day of the month, and doesn’t",
|
|
|
+ "tell what o’clock it is!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why should it?’ muttered the Hatter. ‘Does YOUR watch tell you what",
|
|
|
+ "year it is?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course not,’ Alice replied very readily: ‘but that’s because it",
|
|
|
+ "stays the same year for such a long time together.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Which is just the case with MINE,’ said the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice felt dreadfully puzzled. The Hatter’s remark seemed to have no",
|
|
|
+ "sort of meaning in it, and yet it was certainly English. ‘I don’t quite",
|
|
|
+ "understand you,’ she said, as politely as she could.",
|
|
|
+ "‘The Dormouse is asleep again,’ said the Hatter, and he poured a little",
|
|
|
+ "hot tea upon its nose.",
|
|
|
+ "The Dormouse shook its head impatiently, and said, without opening its",
|
|
|
+ "eyes, ‘Of course, of course; just what I was going to remark myself.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Have you guessed the riddle yet?’ the Hatter said, turning to Alice",
|
|
|
+ "again.",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, I give it up,’ Alice replied: ‘what’s the answer?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I haven’t the slightest idea,’ said the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nor I,’ said the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice sighed wearily. ‘I think you might do something better with the",
|
|
|
+ "time,’ she said, ‘than waste it in asking riddles that have no answers.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘If you knew Time as well as I do,’ said the Hatter, ‘you wouldn’t talk",
|
|
|
+ "about wasting IT. It’s HIM.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t know what you mean,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course you don’t!’ the Hatter said, tossing his head contemptuously.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I dare say you never even spoke to Time!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Perhaps not,’ Alice cautiously replied: ‘but I know I have to beat time",
|
|
|
+ "when I learn music.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Ah! that accounts for it,’ said the Hatter. ‘He won’t stand beating.",
|
|
|
+ "Now, if you only kept on good terms with him, he’d do almost anything",
|
|
|
+ "you liked with the clock. For instance, suppose it were nine o’clock in",
|
|
|
+ "the morning, just time to begin lessons: you’d only have to whisper a",
|
|
|
+ "hint to Time, and round goes the clock in a twinkling! Half-past one,",
|
|
|
+ "time for dinner!’",
|
|
|
+ "[‘I only wish it was,’ the March Hare said to itself in a whisper.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘That would be grand, certainly,’ said Alice thoughtfully: ‘but then--I",
|
|
|
+ "shouldn’t be hungry for it, you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not at first, perhaps,’ said the Hatter: ‘but you could keep it to",
|
|
|
+ "half-past one as long as you liked.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Is that the way YOU manage?’ Alice asked.",
|
|
|
+ "The Hatter shook his head mournfully. ‘Not I!’ he replied. ‘We",
|
|
|
+ "quarrelled last March--just before HE went mad, you know--’ (pointing",
|
|
|
+ "with his tea spoon at the March Hare,) ‘--it was at the great concert",
|
|
|
+ "given by the Queen of Hearts, and I had to sing",
|
|
|
+ " “Twinkle, twinkle, little bat!",
|
|
|
+ " How I wonder what you’re at!”",
|
|
|
+ "You know the song, perhaps?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’ve heard something like it,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It goes on, you know,’ the Hatter continued, ‘in this way:--",
|
|
|
+ " “Up above the world you fly,",
|
|
|
+ " Like a tea-tray in the sky.",
|
|
|
+ " Twinkle, twinkle--“’",
|
|
|
+ "Here the Dormouse shook itself, and began singing in its sleep ‘Twinkle,",
|
|
|
+ "twinkle, twinkle, twinkle--’ and went on so long that they had to pinch",
|
|
|
+ "it to make it stop.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, I’d hardly finished the first verse,’ said the Hatter, ‘when the",
|
|
|
+ "Queen jumped up and bawled out, “He’s murdering the time! Off with his",
|
|
|
+ "head!”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘How dreadfully savage!’ exclaimed Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And ever since that,’ the Hatter went on in a mournful tone, ‘he won’t",
|
|
|
+ "do a thing I ask! It’s always six o’clock now.’",
|
|
|
+ "A bright idea came into Alice’s head. ‘Is that the reason so many",
|
|
|
+ "tea-things are put out here?’ she asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, that’s it,’ said the Hatter with a sigh: ‘it’s always tea-time,",
|
|
|
+ "and we’ve no time to wash the things between whiles.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then you keep moving round, I suppose?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Exactly so,’ said the Hatter: ‘as the things get used up.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But what happens when you come to the beginning again?’ Alice ventured",
|
|
|
+ "to ask.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Suppose we change the subject,’ the March Hare interrupted, yawning.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m getting tired of this. I vote the young lady tells us a story.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m afraid I don’t know one,’ said Alice, rather alarmed at the",
|
|
|
+ "proposal.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then the Dormouse shall!’ they both cried. ‘Wake up, Dormouse!’ And",
|
|
|
+ "they pinched it on both sides at once.",
|
|
|
+ "The Dormouse slowly opened his eyes. ‘I wasn’t asleep,’ he said in a",
|
|
|
+ "hoarse, feeble voice: ‘I heard every word you fellows were saying.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Tell us a story!’ said the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, please do!’ pleaded Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And be quick about it,’ added the Hatter, ‘or you’ll be asleep again",
|
|
|
+ "before it’s done.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Once upon a time there were three little sisters,’ the Dormouse began",
|
|
|
+ "in a great hurry; ‘and their names were Elsie, Lacie, and Tillie; and",
|
|
|
+ "they lived at the bottom of a well--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What did they live on?’ said Alice, who always took a great interest in",
|
|
|
+ "questions of eating and drinking.",
|
|
|
+ "‘They lived on treacle,’ said the Dormouse, after thinking a minute or",
|
|
|
+ "two.",
|
|
|
+ "‘They couldn’t have done that, you know,’ Alice gently remarked; ‘they’d",
|
|
|
+ "have been ill.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘So they were,’ said the Dormouse; ‘VERY ill.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice tried to fancy to herself what such an extraordinary ways of",
|
|
|
+ "living would be like, but it puzzled her too much, so she went on: ‘But",
|
|
|
+ "why did they live at the bottom of a well?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Take some more tea,’ the March Hare said to Alice, very earnestly.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’ve had nothing yet,’ Alice replied in an offended tone, ‘so I can’t",
|
|
|
+ "take more.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You mean you can’t take LESS,’ said the Hatter: ‘it’s very easy to take",
|
|
|
+ "MORE than nothing.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nobody asked YOUR opinion,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Who’s making personal remarks now?’ the Hatter asked triumphantly.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice did not quite know what to say to this: so she helped herself",
|
|
|
+ "to some tea and bread-and-butter, and then turned to the Dormouse, and",
|
|
|
+ "repeated her question. ‘Why did they live at the bottom of a well?’",
|
|
|
+ "The Dormouse again took a minute or two to think about it, and then",
|
|
|
+ "said, ‘It was a treacle-well.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘There’s no such thing!’ Alice was beginning very angrily, but the",
|
|
|
+ "Hatter and the March Hare went ‘Sh! sh!’ and the Dormouse sulkily",
|
|
|
+ "remarked, ‘If you can’t be civil, you’d better finish the story for",
|
|
|
+ "yourself.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, please go on!’ Alice said very humbly; ‘I won’t interrupt again. I",
|
|
|
+ "dare say there may be ONE.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘One, indeed!’ said the Dormouse indignantly. However, he consented to",
|
|
|
+ "go on. ‘And so these three little sisters--they were learning to draw,",
|
|
|
+ "you know--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What did they draw?’ said Alice, quite forgetting her promise.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Treacle,’ said the Dormouse, without considering at all this time.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I want a clean cup,’ interrupted the Hatter: ‘let’s all move one place",
|
|
|
+ "on.’",
|
|
|
+ "He moved on as he spoke, and the Dormouse followed him: the March Hare",
|
|
|
+ "moved into the Dormouse’s place, and Alice rather unwillingly took",
|
|
|
+ "the place of the March Hare. The Hatter was the only one who got any",
|
|
|
+ "advantage from the change: and Alice was a good deal worse off than",
|
|
|
+ "before, as the March Hare had just upset the milk-jug into his plate.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice did not wish to offend the Dormouse again, so she began very",
|
|
|
+ "cautiously: ‘But I don’t understand. Where did they draw the treacle",
|
|
|
+ "from?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You can draw water out of a water-well,’ said the Hatter; ‘so I should",
|
|
|
+ "think you could draw treacle out of a treacle-well--eh, stupid?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But they were IN the well,’ Alice said to the Dormouse, not choosing to",
|
|
|
+ "notice this last remark.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course they were’, said the Dormouse; ‘--well in.’",
|
|
|
+ "This answer so confused poor Alice, that she let the Dormouse go on for",
|
|
|
+ "some time without interrupting it.",
|
|
|
+ "‘They were learning to draw,’ the Dormouse went on, yawning and rubbing",
|
|
|
+ "its eyes, for it was getting very sleepy; ‘and they drew all manner of",
|
|
|
+ "things--everything that begins with an M--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why with an M?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why not?’ said the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was silent.",
|
|
|
+ "The Dormouse had closed its eyes by this time, and was going off into",
|
|
|
+ "a doze; but, on being pinched by the Hatter, it woke up again with",
|
|
|
+ "a little shriek, and went on: ‘--that begins with an M, such as",
|
|
|
+ "mouse-traps, and the moon, and memory, and muchness--you know you say",
|
|
|
+ "things are “much of a muchness”--did you ever see such a thing as a",
|
|
|
+ "drawing of a muchness?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Really, now you ask me,’ said Alice, very much confused, ‘I don’t",
|
|
|
+ "think--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then you shouldn’t talk,’ said the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "This piece of rudeness was more than Alice could bear: she got up in",
|
|
|
+ "great disgust, and walked off; the Dormouse fell asleep instantly, and",
|
|
|
+ "neither of the others took the least notice of her going, though she",
|
|
|
+ "looked back once or twice, half hoping that they would call after her:",
|
|
|
+ "the last time she saw them, they were trying to put the Dormouse into",
|
|
|
+ "the teapot.",
|
|
|
+ "‘At any rate I’ll never go THERE again!’ said Alice as she picked her",
|
|
|
+ "way through the wood. ‘It’s the stupidest tea-party I ever was at in all",
|
|
|
+ "my life!’",
|
|
|
+ "Just as she said this, she noticed that one of the trees had a door",
|
|
|
+ "leading right into it. ‘That’s very curious!’ she thought. ‘But",
|
|
|
+ "everything’s curious today. I think I may as well go in at once.’ And in",
|
|
|
+ "she went.",
|
|
|
+ "Once more she found herself in the long hall, and close to the little",
|
|
|
+ "glass table. ‘Now, I’ll manage better this time,’ she said to herself,",
|
|
|
+ "and began by taking the little golden key, and unlocking the door that",
|
|
|
+ "led into the garden. Then she went to work nibbling at the mushroom (she",
|
|
|
+ "had kept a piece of it in her pocket) till she was about a foot high:",
|
|
|
+ "then she walked down the little passage: and THEN--she found herself at",
|
|
|
+ "last in the beautiful garden, among the bright flower-beds and the cool",
|
|
|
+ "fountains.",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER VIII. The Queen’s Croquet-Ground",
|
|
|
+ "A large rose-tree stood near the entrance of the garden: the roses",
|
|
|
+ "growing on it were white, but there were three gardeners at it, busily",
|
|
|
+ "painting them red. Alice thought this a very curious thing, and she went",
|
|
|
+ "nearer to watch them, and just as she came up to them she heard one of",
|
|
|
+ "them say, ‘Look out now, Five! Don’t go splashing paint over me like",
|
|
|
+ "that!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I couldn’t help it,’ said Five, in a sulky tone; ‘Seven jogged my",
|
|
|
+ "elbow.’",
|
|
|
+ "On which Seven looked up and said, ‘That’s right, Five! Always lay the",
|
|
|
+ "blame on others!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘YOU’D better not talk!’ said Five. ‘I heard the Queen say only",
|
|
|
+ "yesterday you deserved to be beheaded!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What for?’ said the one who had spoken first.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s none of YOUR business, Two!’ said Seven.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, it IS his business!’ said Five, ‘and I’ll tell him--it was for",
|
|
|
+ "bringing the cook tulip-roots instead of onions.’",
|
|
|
+ "Seven flung down his brush, and had just begun ‘Well, of all the unjust",
|
|
|
+ "things--’ when his eye chanced to fall upon Alice, as she stood watching",
|
|
|
+ "them, and he checked himself suddenly: the others looked round also, and",
|
|
|
+ "all of them bowed low.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Would you tell me,’ said Alice, a little timidly, ‘why you are painting",
|
|
|
+ "those roses?’",
|
|
|
+ "Five and Seven said nothing, but looked at Two. Two began in a low",
|
|
|
+ "voice, ‘Why the fact is, you see, Miss, this here ought to have been a",
|
|
|
+ "RED rose-tree, and we put a white one in by mistake; and if the Queen",
|
|
|
+ "was to find it out, we should all have our heads cut off, you know.",
|
|
|
+ "So you see, Miss, we’re doing our best, afore she comes, to--’ At this",
|
|
|
+ "moment Five, who had been anxiously looking across the garden, called",
|
|
|
+ "out ‘The Queen! The Queen!’ and the three gardeners instantly threw",
|
|
|
+ "themselves flat upon their faces. There was a sound of many footsteps,",
|
|
|
+ "and Alice looked round, eager to see the Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "First came ten soldiers carrying clubs; these were all shaped like",
|
|
|
+ "the three gardeners, oblong and flat, with their hands and feet at the",
|
|
|
+ "corners: next the ten courtiers; these were ornamented all over with",
|
|
|
+ "diamonds, and walked two and two, as the soldiers did. After these came",
|
|
|
+ "the royal children; there were ten of them, and the little dears came",
|
|
|
+ "jumping merrily along hand in hand, in couples: they were all ornamented",
|
|
|
+ "with hearts. Next came the guests, mostly Kings and Queens, and among",
|
|
|
+ "them Alice recognised the White Rabbit: it was talking in a hurried",
|
|
|
+ "nervous manner, smiling at everything that was said, and went by without",
|
|
|
+ "noticing her. Then followed the Knave of Hearts, carrying the King’s",
|
|
|
+ "crown on a crimson velvet cushion; and, last of all this grand",
|
|
|
+ "procession, came THE KING AND QUEEN OF HEARTS.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was rather doubtful whether she ought not to lie down on her face",
|
|
|
+ "like the three gardeners, but she could not remember ever having heard",
|
|
|
+ "of such a rule at processions; ‘and besides, what would be the use of",
|
|
|
+ "a procession,’ thought she, ‘if people had all to lie down upon their",
|
|
|
+ "faces, so that they couldn’t see it?’ So she stood still where she was,",
|
|
|
+ "and waited.",
|
|
|
+ "When the procession came opposite to Alice, they all stopped and looked",
|
|
|
+ "at her, and the Queen said severely ‘Who is this?’ She said it to the",
|
|
|
+ "Knave of Hearts, who only bowed and smiled in reply.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Idiot!’ said the Queen, tossing her head impatiently; and, turning to",
|
|
|
+ "Alice, she went on, ‘What’s your name, child?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘My name is Alice, so please your Majesty,’ said Alice very politely;",
|
|
|
+ "but she added, to herself, ‘Why, they’re only a pack of cards, after",
|
|
|
+ "all. I needn’t be afraid of them!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘And who are THESE?’ said the Queen, pointing to the three gardeners who",
|
|
|
+ "were lying round the rosetree; for, you see, as they were lying on their",
|
|
|
+ "faces, and the pattern on their backs was the same as the rest of the",
|
|
|
+ "pack, she could not tell whether they were gardeners, or soldiers, or",
|
|
|
+ "courtiers, or three of her own children.",
|
|
|
+ "‘How should I know?’ said Alice, surprised at her own courage. ‘It’s no",
|
|
|
+ "business of MINE.’",
|
|
|
+ "The Queen turned crimson with fury, and, after glaring at her for a",
|
|
|
+ "moment like a wild beast, screamed ‘Off with her head! Off--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nonsense!’ said Alice, very loudly and decidedly, and the Queen was",
|
|
|
+ "silent.",
|
|
|
+ "The King laid his hand upon her arm, and timidly said ‘Consider, my",
|
|
|
+ "dear: she is only a child!’",
|
|
|
+ "The Queen turned angrily away from him, and said to the Knave ‘Turn them",
|
|
|
+ "over!’",
|
|
|
+ "The Knave did so, very carefully, with one foot.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Get up!’ said the Queen, in a shrill, loud voice, and the three",
|
|
|
+ "gardeners instantly jumped up, and began bowing to the King, the Queen,",
|
|
|
+ "the royal children, and everybody else.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Leave off that!’ screamed the Queen. ‘You make me giddy.’ And then,",
|
|
|
+ "turning to the rose-tree, she went on, ‘What HAVE you been doing here?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘May it please your Majesty,’ said Two, in a very humble tone, going",
|
|
|
+ "down on one knee as he spoke, ‘we were trying--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I see!’ said the Queen, who had meanwhile been examining the roses.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Off with their heads!’ and the procession moved on, three of the",
|
|
|
+ "soldiers remaining behind to execute the unfortunate gardeners, who ran",
|
|
|
+ "to Alice for protection.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You shan’t be beheaded!’ said Alice, and she put them into a large",
|
|
|
+ "flower-pot that stood near. The three soldiers wandered about for a",
|
|
|
+ "minute or two, looking for them, and then quietly marched off after the",
|
|
|
+ "others.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Are their heads off?’ shouted the Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Their heads are gone, if it please your Majesty!’ the soldiers shouted",
|
|
|
+ "in reply.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s right!’ shouted the Queen. ‘Can you play croquet?’",
|
|
|
+ "The soldiers were silent, and looked at Alice, as the question was",
|
|
|
+ "evidently meant for her.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes!’ shouted Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come on, then!’ roared the Queen, and Alice joined the procession,",
|
|
|
+ "wondering very much what would happen next.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s--it’s a very fine day!’ said a timid voice at her side. She was",
|
|
|
+ "walking by the White Rabbit, who was peeping anxiously into her face.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Very,’ said Alice: ‘--where’s the Duchess?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Hush! Hush!’ said the Rabbit in a low, hurried tone. He looked",
|
|
|
+ "anxiously over his shoulder as he spoke, and then raised himself upon",
|
|
|
+ "tiptoe, put his mouth close to her ear, and whispered ‘She’s under",
|
|
|
+ "sentence of execution.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What for?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Did you say “What a pity!”?’ the Rabbit asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, I didn’t,’ said Alice: ‘I don’t think it’s at all a pity. I said",
|
|
|
+ "“What for?”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘She boxed the Queen’s ears--’ the Rabbit began. Alice gave a little",
|
|
|
+ "scream of laughter. ‘Oh, hush!’ the Rabbit whispered in a frightened",
|
|
|
+ "tone. ‘The Queen will hear you! You see, she came rather late, and the",
|
|
|
+ "Queen said--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Get to your places!’ shouted the Queen in a voice of thunder, and",
|
|
|
+ "people began running about in all directions, tumbling up against each",
|
|
|
+ "other; however, they got settled down in a minute or two, and the game",
|
|
|
+ "began. Alice thought she had never seen such a curious croquet-ground in",
|
|
|
+ "her life; it was all ridges and furrows; the balls were live hedgehogs,",
|
|
|
+ "the mallets live flamingoes, and the soldiers had to double themselves",
|
|
|
+ "up and to stand on their hands and feet, to make the arches.",
|
|
|
+ "The chief difficulty Alice found at first was in managing her flamingo:",
|
|
|
+ "she succeeded in getting its body tucked away, comfortably enough, under",
|
|
|
+ "her arm, with its legs hanging down, but generally, just as she had got",
|
|
|
+ "its neck nicely straightened out, and was going to give the hedgehog a",
|
|
|
+ "blow with its head, it WOULD twist itself round and look up in her face,",
|
|
|
+ "with such a puzzled expression that she could not help bursting out",
|
|
|
+ "laughing: and when she had got its head down, and was going to begin",
|
|
|
+ "again, it was very provoking to find that the hedgehog had unrolled",
|
|
|
+ "itself, and was in the act of crawling away: besides all this, there was",
|
|
|
+ "generally a ridge or furrow in the way wherever she wanted to send the",
|
|
|
+ "hedgehog to, and, as the doubled-up soldiers were always getting up",
|
|
|
+ "and walking off to other parts of the ground, Alice soon came to the",
|
|
|
+ "conclusion that it was a very difficult game indeed.",
|
|
|
+ "The players all played at once without waiting for turns, quarrelling",
|
|
|
+ "all the while, and fighting for the hedgehogs; and in a very short",
|
|
|
+ "time the Queen was in a furious passion, and went stamping about, and",
|
|
|
+ "shouting ‘Off with his head!’ or ‘Off with her head!’ about once in a",
|
|
|
+ "minute.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice began to feel very uneasy: to be sure, she had not as yet had any",
|
|
|
+ "dispute with the Queen, but she knew that it might happen any minute,",
|
|
|
+ "‘and then,’ thought she, ‘what would become of me? They’re dreadfully",
|
|
|
+ "fond of beheading people here; the great wonder is, that there’s any one",
|
|
|
+ "left alive!’",
|
|
|
+ "She was looking about for some way of escape, and wondering whether she",
|
|
|
+ "could get away without being seen, when she noticed a curious appearance",
|
|
|
+ "in the air: it puzzled her very much at first, but, after watching it",
|
|
|
+ "a minute or two, she made it out to be a grin, and she said to herself",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s the Cheshire Cat: now I shall have somebody to talk to.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘How are you getting on?’ said the Cat, as soon as there was mouth",
|
|
|
+ "enough for it to speak with.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice waited till the eyes appeared, and then nodded. ‘It’s no use",
|
|
|
+ "speaking to it,’ she thought, ‘till its ears have come, or at least one",
|
|
|
+ "of them.’ In another minute the whole head appeared, and then Alice put",
|
|
|
+ "down her flamingo, and began an account of the game, feeling very glad",
|
|
|
+ "she had someone to listen to her. The Cat seemed to think that there was",
|
|
|
+ "enough of it now in sight, and no more of it appeared.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t think they play at all fairly,’ Alice began, in rather a",
|
|
|
+ "complaining tone, ‘and they all quarrel so dreadfully one can’t hear",
|
|
|
+ "oneself speak--and they don’t seem to have any rules in particular;",
|
|
|
+ "at least, if there are, nobody attends to them--and you’ve no idea how",
|
|
|
+ "confusing it is all the things being alive; for instance, there’s the",
|
|
|
+ "arch I’ve got to go through next walking about at the other end of the",
|
|
|
+ "ground--and I should have croqueted the Queen’s hedgehog just now, only",
|
|
|
+ "it ran away when it saw mine coming!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘How do you like the Queen?’ said the Cat in a low voice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not at all,’ said Alice: ‘she’s so extremely--’ Just then she noticed",
|
|
|
+ "that the Queen was close behind her, listening: so she went on,",
|
|
|
+ "‘--likely to win, that it’s hardly worth while finishing the game.’",
|
|
|
+ "The Queen smiled and passed on.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Who ARE you talking to?’ said the King, going up to Alice, and looking",
|
|
|
+ "at the Cat’s head with great curiosity.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s a friend of mine--a Cheshire Cat,’ said Alice: ‘allow me to",
|
|
|
+ "introduce it.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t like the look of it at all,’ said the King: ‘however, it may",
|
|
|
+ "kiss my hand if it likes.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’d rather not,’ the Cat remarked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Don’t be impertinent,’ said the King, ‘and don’t look at me like that!’",
|
|
|
+ "He got behind Alice as he spoke.",
|
|
|
+ "‘A cat may look at a king,’ said Alice. ‘I’ve read that in some book,",
|
|
|
+ "but I don’t remember where.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, it must be removed,’ said the King very decidedly, and he called",
|
|
|
+ "the Queen, who was passing at the moment, ‘My dear! I wish you would",
|
|
|
+ "have this cat removed!’",
|
|
|
+ "The Queen had only one way of settling all difficulties, great or small.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Off with his head!’ she said, without even looking round.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’ll fetch the executioner myself,’ said the King eagerly, and he",
|
|
|
+ "hurried off.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice thought she might as well go back, and see how the game was going",
|
|
|
+ "on, as she heard the Queen’s voice in the distance, screaming with",
|
|
|
+ "passion. She had already heard her sentence three of the players to be",
|
|
|
+ "executed for having missed their turns, and she did not like the look",
|
|
|
+ "of things at all, as the game was in such confusion that she never knew",
|
|
|
+ "whether it was her turn or not. So she went in search of her hedgehog.",
|
|
|
+ "The hedgehog was engaged in a fight with another hedgehog, which seemed",
|
|
|
+ "to Alice an excellent opportunity for croqueting one of them with the",
|
|
|
+ "other: the only difficulty was, that her flamingo was gone across to the",
|
|
|
+ "other side of the garden, where Alice could see it trying in a helpless",
|
|
|
+ "sort of way to fly up into a tree.",
|
|
|
+ "By the time she had caught the flamingo and brought it back, the fight",
|
|
|
+ "was over, and both the hedgehogs were out of sight: ‘but it doesn’t",
|
|
|
+ "matter much,’ thought Alice, ‘as all the arches are gone from this side",
|
|
|
+ "of the ground.’ So she tucked it away under her arm, that it might not",
|
|
|
+ "escape again, and went back for a little more conversation with her",
|
|
|
+ "friend.",
|
|
|
+ "When she got back to the Cheshire Cat, she was surprised to find quite a",
|
|
|
+ "large crowd collected round it: there was a dispute going on between",
|
|
|
+ "the executioner, the King, and the Queen, who were all talking at once,",
|
|
|
+ "while all the rest were quite silent, and looked very uncomfortable.",
|
|
|
+ "The moment Alice appeared, she was appealed to by all three to settle",
|
|
|
+ "the question, and they repeated their arguments to her, though, as they",
|
|
|
+ "all spoke at once, she found it very hard indeed to make out exactly",
|
|
|
+ "what they said.",
|
|
|
+ "The executioner’s argument was, that you couldn’t cut off a head unless",
|
|
|
+ "there was a body to cut it off from: that he had never had to do such a",
|
|
|
+ "thing before, and he wasn’t going to begin at HIS time of life.",
|
|
|
+ "The King’s argument was, that anything that had a head could be",
|
|
|
+ "beheaded, and that you weren’t to talk nonsense.",
|
|
|
+ "The Queen’s argument was, that if something wasn’t done about it in less",
|
|
|
+ "than no time she’d have everybody executed, all round. (It was this last",
|
|
|
+ "remark that had made the whole party look so grave and anxious.)",
|
|
|
+ "Alice could think of nothing else to say but ‘It belongs to the Duchess:",
|
|
|
+ "you’d better ask HER about it.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘She’s in prison,’ the Queen said to the executioner: ‘fetch her here.’",
|
|
|
+ "And the executioner went off like an arrow.",
|
|
|
+ " The Cat’s head began fading away the moment he was gone, and,",
|
|
|
+ "by the time he had come back with the Duchess, it had entirely",
|
|
|
+ "disappeared; so the King and the executioner ran wildly up and down",
|
|
|
+ "looking for it, while the rest of the party went back to the game.",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER IX. The Mock Turtle’s Story",
|
|
|
+ "‘You can’t think how glad I am to see you again, you dear old thing!’",
|
|
|
+ "said the Duchess, as she tucked her arm affectionately into Alice’s, and",
|
|
|
+ "they walked off together.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was very glad to find her in such a pleasant temper, and thought",
|
|
|
+ "to herself that perhaps it was only the pepper that had made her so",
|
|
|
+ "savage when they met in the kitchen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘When I’M a Duchess,’ she said to herself, (not in a very hopeful tone",
|
|
|
+ "though), ‘I won’t have any pepper in my kitchen AT ALL. Soup does very",
|
|
|
+ "well without--Maybe it’s always pepper that makes people hot-tempered,’",
|
|
|
+ "she went on, very much pleased at having found out a new kind of",
|
|
|
+ "rule, ‘and vinegar that makes them sour--and camomile that makes",
|
|
|
+ "them bitter--and--and barley-sugar and such things that make children",
|
|
|
+ "sweet-tempered. I only wish people knew that: then they wouldn’t be so",
|
|
|
+ "stingy about it, you know--’",
|
|
|
+ "She had quite forgotten the Duchess by this time, and was a little",
|
|
|
+ "startled when she heard her voice close to her ear. ‘You’re thinking",
|
|
|
+ "about something, my dear, and that makes you forget to talk. I can’t",
|
|
|
+ "tell you just now what the moral of that is, but I shall remember it in",
|
|
|
+ "a bit.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Perhaps it hasn’t one,’ Alice ventured to remark.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Tut, tut, child!’ said the Duchess. ‘Everything’s got a moral, if only",
|
|
|
+ "you can find it.’ And she squeezed herself up closer to Alice’s side as",
|
|
|
+ "she spoke.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice did not much like keeping so close to her: first, because the",
|
|
|
+ "Duchess was VERY ugly; and secondly, because she was exactly the",
|
|
|
+ "right height to rest her chin upon Alice’s shoulder, and it was an",
|
|
|
+ "uncomfortably sharp chin. However, she did not like to be rude, so she",
|
|
|
+ "bore it as well as she could.",
|
|
|
+ "‘The game’s going on rather better now,’ she said, by way of keeping up",
|
|
|
+ "the conversation a little.",
|
|
|
+ "‘’Tis so,’ said the Duchess: ‘and the moral of that is--“Oh, ‘tis love,",
|
|
|
+ "‘tis love, that makes the world go round!”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Somebody said,’ Alice whispered, ‘that it’s done by everybody minding",
|
|
|
+ "their own business!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Ah, well! It means much the same thing,’ said the Duchess, digging her",
|
|
|
+ "sharp little chin into Alice’s shoulder as she added, ‘and the moral",
|
|
|
+ "of THAT is--“Take care of the sense, and the sounds will take care of",
|
|
|
+ "themselves.”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘How fond she is of finding morals in things!’ Alice thought to herself.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I dare say you’re wondering why I don’t put my arm round your waist,’",
|
|
|
+ "the Duchess said after a pause: ‘the reason is, that I’m doubtful about",
|
|
|
+ "the temper of your flamingo. Shall I try the experiment?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘HE might bite,’ Alice cautiously replied, not feeling at all anxious to",
|
|
|
+ "have the experiment tried.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Very true,’ said the Duchess: ‘flamingoes and mustard both bite. And",
|
|
|
+ "the moral of that is--“Birds of a feather flock together.”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Only mustard isn’t a bird,’ Alice remarked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Right, as usual,’ said the Duchess: ‘what a clear way you have of",
|
|
|
+ "putting things!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s a mineral, I THINK,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course it is,’ said the Duchess, who seemed ready to agree to",
|
|
|
+ "everything that Alice said; ‘there’s a large mustard-mine near here. And",
|
|
|
+ "the moral of that is--“The more there is of mine, the less there is of",
|
|
|
+ "yours.”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, I know!’ exclaimed Alice, who had not attended to this last remark,",
|
|
|
+ "‘it’s a vegetable. It doesn’t look like one, but it is.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I quite agree with you,’ said the Duchess; ‘and the moral of that",
|
|
|
+ "is--“Be what you would seem to be”--or if you’d like it put more",
|
|
|
+ "simply--“Never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might",
|
|
|
+ "appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise",
|
|
|
+ "than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise.”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I think I should understand that better,’ Alice said very politely, ‘if",
|
|
|
+ "I had it written down: but I can’t quite follow it as you say it.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s nothing to what I could say if I chose,’ the Duchess replied, in",
|
|
|
+ "a pleased tone.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Pray don’t trouble yourself to say it any longer than that,’ said",
|
|
|
+ "Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, don’t talk about trouble!’ said the Duchess. ‘I make you a present",
|
|
|
+ "of everything I’ve said as yet.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘A cheap sort of present!’ thought Alice. ‘I’m glad they don’t give",
|
|
|
+ "birthday presents like that!’ But she did not venture to say it out",
|
|
|
+ "loud.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Thinking again?’ the Duchess asked, with another dig of her sharp",
|
|
|
+ "little chin.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’ve a right to think,’ said Alice sharply, for she was beginning to",
|
|
|
+ "feel a little worried.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Just about as much right,’ said the Duchess, ‘as pigs have to fly; and",
|
|
|
+ "the m--’",
|
|
|
+ "But here, to Alice’s great surprise, the Duchess’s voice died away, even",
|
|
|
+ "in the middle of her favourite word ‘moral,’ and the arm that was linked",
|
|
|
+ "into hers began to tremble. Alice looked up, and there stood the Queen",
|
|
|
+ "in front of them, with her arms folded, frowning like a thunderstorm.",
|
|
|
+ "‘A fine day, your Majesty!’ the Duchess began in a low, weak voice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Now, I give you fair warning,’ shouted the Queen, stamping on the",
|
|
|
+ "ground as she spoke; ‘either you or your head must be off, and that in",
|
|
|
+ "about half no time! Take your choice!’",
|
|
|
+ "The Duchess took her choice, and was gone in a moment.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Let’s go on with the game,’ the Queen said to Alice; and Alice was",
|
|
|
+ "too much frightened to say a word, but slowly followed her back to the",
|
|
|
+ "croquet-ground.",
|
|
|
+ "The other guests had taken advantage of the Queen’s absence, and were",
|
|
|
+ "resting in the shade: however, the moment they saw her, they hurried",
|
|
|
+ "back to the game, the Queen merely remarking that a moment’s delay would",
|
|
|
+ "cost them their lives.",
|
|
|
+ "All the time they were playing the Queen never left off quarrelling with",
|
|
|
+ "the other players, and shouting ‘Off with his head!’ or ‘Off with her",
|
|
|
+ "head!’ Those whom she sentenced were taken into custody by the soldiers,",
|
|
|
+ "who of course had to leave off being arches to do this, so that by",
|
|
|
+ "the end of half an hour or so there were no arches left, and all the",
|
|
|
+ "players, except the King, the Queen, and Alice, were in custody and",
|
|
|
+ "under sentence of execution.",
|
|
|
+ "Then the Queen left off, quite out of breath, and said to Alice, ‘Have",
|
|
|
+ "you seen the Mock Turtle yet?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘No,’ said Alice. ‘I don’t even know what a Mock Turtle is.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s the thing Mock Turtle Soup is made from,’ said the Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I never saw one, or heard of one,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come on, then,’ said the Queen, ‘and he shall tell you his history,’",
|
|
|
+ "As they walked off together, Alice heard the King say in a low voice,",
|
|
|
+ "to the company generally, ‘You are all pardoned.’ ‘Come, THAT’S a good",
|
|
|
+ "thing!’ she said to herself, for she had felt quite unhappy at the",
|
|
|
+ "number of executions the Queen had ordered.",
|
|
|
+ "They very soon came upon a Gryphon, lying fast asleep in the sun.",
|
|
|
+ "(IF you don’t know what a Gryphon is, look at the picture.) ‘Up, lazy",
|
|
|
+ "thing!’ said the Queen, ‘and take this young lady to see the Mock",
|
|
|
+ "Turtle, and to hear his history. I must go back and see after some",
|
|
|
+ "executions I have ordered’; and she walked off, leaving Alice alone with",
|
|
|
+ "the Gryphon. Alice did not quite like the look of the creature, but on",
|
|
|
+ "the whole she thought it would be quite as safe to stay with it as to go",
|
|
|
+ "after that savage Queen: so she waited.",
|
|
|
+ "The Gryphon sat up and rubbed its eyes: then it watched the Queen till",
|
|
|
+ "she was out of sight: then it chuckled. ‘What fun!’ said the Gryphon,",
|
|
|
+ "half to itself, half to Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What IS the fun?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why, SHE,’ said the Gryphon. ‘It’s all her fancy, that: they never",
|
|
|
+ "executes nobody, you know. Come on!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Everybody says “come on!” here,’ thought Alice, as she went slowly",
|
|
|
+ "after it: ‘I never was so ordered about in all my life, never!’",
|
|
|
+ "They had not gone far before they saw the Mock Turtle in the distance,",
|
|
|
+ "sitting sad and lonely on a little ledge of rock, and, as they came",
|
|
|
+ "nearer, Alice could hear him sighing as if his heart would break. She",
|
|
|
+ "pitied him deeply. ‘What is his sorrow?’ she asked the Gryphon, and the",
|
|
|
+ "Gryphon answered, very nearly in the same words as before, ‘It’s all his",
|
|
|
+ "fancy, that: he hasn’t got no sorrow, you know. Come on!’",
|
|
|
+ "So they went up to the Mock Turtle, who looked at them with large eyes",
|
|
|
+ "full of tears, but said nothing.",
|
|
|
+ "‘This here young lady,’ said the Gryphon, ‘she wants for to know your",
|
|
|
+ "history, she do.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’ll tell it her,’ said the Mock Turtle in a deep, hollow tone: ‘sit",
|
|
|
+ "down, both of you, and don’t speak a word till I’ve finished.’",
|
|
|
+ "So they sat down, and nobody spoke for some minutes. Alice thought to",
|
|
|
+ "herself, ‘I don’t see how he can EVEN finish, if he doesn’t begin.’ But",
|
|
|
+ "she waited patiently.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Once,’ said the Mock Turtle at last, with a deep sigh, ‘I was a real",
|
|
|
+ "Turtle.’",
|
|
|
+ "These words were followed by a very long silence, broken only by an",
|
|
|
+ "occasional exclamation of ‘Hjckrrh!’ from the Gryphon, and the constant",
|
|
|
+ "heavy sobbing of the Mock Turtle. Alice was very nearly getting up and",
|
|
|
+ "saying, ‘Thank you, sir, for your interesting story,’ but she could",
|
|
|
+ "not help thinking there MUST be more to come, so she sat still and said",
|
|
|
+ "nothing.",
|
|
|
+ "‘When we were little,’ the Mock Turtle went on at last, more calmly,",
|
|
|
+ "though still sobbing a little now and then, ‘we went to school in the",
|
|
|
+ "sea. The master was an old Turtle--we used to call him Tortoise--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why did you call him Tortoise, if he wasn’t one?’ Alice asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘We called him Tortoise because he taught us,’ said the Mock Turtle",
|
|
|
+ "angrily: ‘really you are very dull!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You ought to be ashamed of yourself for asking such a simple question,’",
|
|
|
+ "added the Gryphon; and then they both sat silent and looked at poor",
|
|
|
+ "Alice, who felt ready to sink into the earth. At last the Gryphon said",
|
|
|
+ "to the Mock Turtle, ‘Drive on, old fellow! Don’t be all day about it!’",
|
|
|
+ "and he went on in these words:",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, we went to school in the sea, though you mayn’t believe it--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I never said I didn’t!’ interrupted Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You did,’ said the Mock Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Hold your tongue!’ added the Gryphon, before Alice could speak again.",
|
|
|
+ "The Mock Turtle went on.",
|
|
|
+ "‘We had the best of educations--in fact, we went to school every day--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’VE been to a day-school, too,’ said Alice; ‘you needn’t be so proud",
|
|
|
+ "as all that.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘With extras?’ asked the Mock Turtle a little anxiously.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes,’ said Alice, ‘we learned French and music.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘And washing?’ said the Mock Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Certainly not!’ said Alice indignantly.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Ah! then yours wasn’t a really good school,’ said the Mock Turtle in",
|
|
|
+ "a tone of great relief. ‘Now at OURS they had at the end of the bill,",
|
|
|
+ "“French, music, AND WASHING--extra.”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You couldn’t have wanted it much,’ said Alice; ‘living at the bottom of",
|
|
|
+ "the sea.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I couldn’t afford to learn it.’ said the Mock Turtle with a sigh. ‘I",
|
|
|
+ "only took the regular course.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What was that?’ inquired Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Reeling and Writhing, of course, to begin with,’ the Mock Turtle",
|
|
|
+ "replied; ‘and then the different branches of Arithmetic--Ambition,",
|
|
|
+ "Distraction, Uglification, and Derision.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I never heard of “Uglification,”’ Alice ventured to say. ‘What is it?’",
|
|
|
+ "The Gryphon lifted up both its paws in surprise. ‘What! Never heard of",
|
|
|
+ "uglifying!’ it exclaimed. ‘You know what to beautify is, I suppose?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes,’ said Alice doubtfully: ‘it means--to--make--anything--prettier.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, then,’ the Gryphon went on, ‘if you don’t know what to uglify is,",
|
|
|
+ "you ARE a simpleton.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice did not feel encouraged to ask any more questions about it, so she",
|
|
|
+ "turned to the Mock Turtle, and said ‘What else had you to learn?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, there was Mystery,’ the Mock Turtle replied, counting off",
|
|
|
+ "the subjects on his flappers, ‘--Mystery, ancient and modern, with",
|
|
|
+ "Seaography: then Drawling--the Drawling-master was an old conger-eel,",
|
|
|
+ "that used to come once a week: HE taught us Drawling, Stretching, and",
|
|
|
+ "Fainting in Coils.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What was THAT like?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, I can’t show it you myself,’ the Mock Turtle said: ‘I’m too",
|
|
|
+ "stiff. And the Gryphon never learnt it.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Hadn’t time,’ said the Gryphon: ‘I went to the Classics master, though.",
|
|
|
+ "He was an old crab, HE was.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I never went to him,’ the Mock Turtle said with a sigh: ‘he taught",
|
|
|
+ "Laughing and Grief, they used to say.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘So he did, so he did,’ said the Gryphon, sighing in his turn; and both",
|
|
|
+ "creatures hid their faces in their paws.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And how many hours a day did you do lessons?’ said Alice, in a hurry to",
|
|
|
+ "change the subject.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Ten hours the first day,’ said the Mock Turtle: ‘nine the next, and so",
|
|
|
+ "on.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What a curious plan!’ exclaimed Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s the reason they’re called lessons,’ the Gryphon remarked:",
|
|
|
+ "‘because they lessen from day to day.’",
|
|
|
+ "This was quite a new idea to Alice, and she thought it over a little",
|
|
|
+ "before she made her next remark. ‘Then the eleventh day must have been a",
|
|
|
+ "holiday?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course it was,’ said the Mock Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And how did you manage on the twelfth?’ Alice went on eagerly.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s enough about lessons,’ the Gryphon interrupted in a very decided",
|
|
|
+ "tone: ‘tell her something about the games now.’",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER X. The Lobster Quadrille",
|
|
|
+ "The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and drew the back of one flapper across",
|
|
|
+ "his eyes. He looked at Alice, and tried to speak, but for a minute or",
|
|
|
+ "two sobs choked his voice. ‘Same as if he had a bone in his throat,’",
|
|
|
+ "said the Gryphon: and it set to work shaking him and punching him in",
|
|
|
+ "the back. At last the Mock Turtle recovered his voice, and, with tears",
|
|
|
+ "running down his cheeks, he went on again:--",
|
|
|
+ "‘You may not have lived much under the sea--’ [‘I haven’t,’ said",
|
|
|
+ "Alice)--‘and perhaps you were never even introduced to a lobster--’",
|
|
|
+ "(Alice began to say ‘I once tasted--’ but checked herself hastily, and",
|
|
|
+ "said ‘No, never’) ‘--so you can have no idea what a delightful thing a",
|
|
|
+ "Lobster Quadrille is!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, indeed,’ said Alice. ‘What sort of a dance is it?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why,’ said the Gryphon, ‘you first form into a line along the",
|
|
|
+ "sea-shore--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Two lines!’ cried the Mock Turtle. ‘Seals, turtles, salmon, and so on;",
|
|
|
+ "then, when you’ve cleared all the jelly-fish out of the way--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘THAT generally takes some time,’ interrupted the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘--you advance twice--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Each with a lobster as a partner!’ cried the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course,’ the Mock Turtle said: ‘advance twice, set to partners--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘--change lobsters, and retire in same order,’ continued the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then, you know,’ the Mock Turtle went on, ‘you throw the--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘The lobsters!’ shouted the Gryphon, with a bound into the air.",
|
|
|
+ "‘--as far out to sea as you can--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Swim after them!’ screamed the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Turn a somersault in the sea!’ cried the Mock Turtle, capering wildly",
|
|
|
+ "about.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Change lobsters again!’ yelled the Gryphon at the top of its voice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Back to land again, and that’s all the first figure,’ said the Mock",
|
|
|
+ "Turtle, suddenly dropping his voice; and the two creatures, who had been",
|
|
|
+ "jumping about like mad things all this time, sat down again very sadly",
|
|
|
+ "and quietly, and looked at Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It must be a very pretty dance,’ said Alice timidly.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Would you like to see a little of it?’ said the Mock Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Very much indeed,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come, let’s try the first figure!’ said the Mock Turtle to the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘We can do without lobsters, you know. Which shall sing?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, YOU sing,’ said the Gryphon. ‘I’ve forgotten the words.’",
|
|
|
+ "So they began solemnly dancing round and round Alice, every now and",
|
|
|
+ "then treading on her toes when they passed too close, and waving their",
|
|
|
+ "forepaws to mark the time, while the Mock Turtle sang this, very slowly",
|
|
|
+ "and sadly:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘“Will you walk a little faster?” said a whiting to a snail.",
|
|
|
+ " “There’s a porpoise close behind us, and he’s treading on my tail.",
|
|
|
+ " See how eagerly the lobsters and the turtles all advance!",
|
|
|
+ " They are waiting on the shingle--will you come and join the dance?",
|
|
|
+ " Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?",
|
|
|
+ " Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, won’t you join the dance?",
|
|
|
+ " “You can really have no notion how delightful it will be",
|
|
|
+ " When they take us up and throw us, with the lobsters, out to sea!”",
|
|
|
+ " But the snail replied “Too far, too far!” and gave a look askance--",
|
|
|
+ " Said he thanked the whiting kindly, but he would not join the dance.",
|
|
|
+ " Would not, could not, would not, could not, would not join the dance.",
|
|
|
+ " Would not, could not, would not, could not, could not join the dance.",
|
|
|
+ " ‘“What matters it how far we go?” his scaly friend replied.",
|
|
|
+ " “There is another shore, you know, upon the other side.",
|
|
|
+ " The further off from England the nearer is to France--",
|
|
|
+ " Then turn not pale, beloved snail, but come and join the dance.",
|
|
|
+ " Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, will you join the dance?",
|
|
|
+ " Will you, won’t you, will you, won’t you, won’t you join the dance?”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Thank you, it’s a very interesting dance to watch,’ said Alice, feeling",
|
|
|
+ "very glad that it was over at last: ‘and I do so like that curious song",
|
|
|
+ "about the whiting!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, as to the whiting,’ said the Mock Turtle, ‘they--you’ve seen them,",
|
|
|
+ "of course?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes,’ said Alice, ‘I’ve often seen them at dinn--’ she checked herself",
|
|
|
+ "hastily.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I don’t know where Dinn may be,’ said the Mock Turtle, ‘but if you’ve",
|
|
|
+ "seen them so often, of course you know what they’re like.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I believe so,’ Alice replied thoughtfully. ‘They have their tails in",
|
|
|
+ "their mouths--and they’re all over crumbs.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You’re wrong about the crumbs,’ said the Mock Turtle: ‘crumbs would all",
|
|
|
+ "wash off in the sea. But they HAVE their tails in their mouths; and the",
|
|
|
+ "reason is--’ here the Mock Turtle yawned and shut his eyes.--‘Tell her",
|
|
|
+ "about the reason and all that,’ he said to the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘The reason is,’ said the Gryphon, ‘that they WOULD go with the lobsters",
|
|
|
+ "to the dance. So they got thrown out to sea. So they had to fall a long",
|
|
|
+ "way. So they got their tails fast in their mouths. So they couldn’t get",
|
|
|
+ "them out again. That’s all.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Thank you,’ said Alice, ‘it’s very interesting. I never knew so much",
|
|
|
+ "about a whiting before.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I can tell you more than that, if you like,’ said the Gryphon. ‘Do you",
|
|
|
+ "know why it’s called a whiting?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I never thought about it,’ said Alice. ‘Why?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘IT DOES THE BOOTS AND SHOES.’ the Gryphon replied very solemnly.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice was thoroughly puzzled. ‘Does the boots and shoes!’ she repeated",
|
|
|
+ "in a wondering tone.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why, what are YOUR shoes done with?’ said the Gryphon. ‘I mean, what",
|
|
|
+ "makes them so shiny?’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice looked down at them, and considered a little before she gave her",
|
|
|
+ "answer. ‘They’re done with blacking, I believe.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Boots and shoes under the sea,’ the Gryphon went on in a deep voice,",
|
|
|
+ "‘are done with a whiting. Now you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘And what are they made of?’ Alice asked in a tone of great curiosity.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Soles and eels, of course,’ the Gryphon replied rather impatiently:",
|
|
|
+ "‘any shrimp could have told you that.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘If I’d been the whiting,’ said Alice, whose thoughts were still running",
|
|
|
+ "on the song, ‘I’d have said to the porpoise, “Keep back, please: we",
|
|
|
+ "don’t want YOU with us!”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘They were obliged to have him with them,’ the Mock Turtle said: ‘no",
|
|
|
+ "wise fish would go anywhere without a porpoise.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Wouldn’t it really?’ said Alice in a tone of great surprise.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course not,’ said the Mock Turtle: ‘why, if a fish came to ME, and",
|
|
|
+ "told me he was going a journey, I should say “With what porpoise?”’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Don’t you mean “purpose”?’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I mean what I say,’ the Mock Turtle replied in an offended tone. And",
|
|
|
+ "the Gryphon added ‘Come, let’s hear some of YOUR adventures.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I could tell you my adventures--beginning from this morning,’ said",
|
|
|
+ "Alice a little timidly: ‘but it’s no use going back to yesterday,",
|
|
|
+ "because I was a different person then.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Explain all that,’ said the Mock Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, no! The adventures first,’ said the Gryphon in an impatient tone:",
|
|
|
+ "‘explanations take such a dreadful time.’",
|
|
|
+ "So Alice began telling them her adventures from the time when she first",
|
|
|
+ "saw the White Rabbit. She was a little nervous about it just at first,",
|
|
|
+ "the two creatures got so close to her, one on each side, and opened",
|
|
|
+ "their eyes and mouths so VERY wide, but she gained courage as she went",
|
|
|
+ "on. Her listeners were perfectly quiet till she got to the part about",
|
|
|
+ "her repeating ‘YOU ARE OLD, FATHER WILLIAM,’ to the Caterpillar, and the",
|
|
|
+ "words all coming different, and then the Mock Turtle drew a long breath,",
|
|
|
+ "and said ‘That’s very curious.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s all about as curious as it can be,’ said the Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It all came different!’ the Mock Turtle repeated thoughtfully. ‘I",
|
|
|
+ "should like to hear her try and repeat something now. Tell her to",
|
|
|
+ "begin.’ He looked at the Gryphon as if he thought it had some kind of",
|
|
|
+ "authority over Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Stand up and repeat “‘TIS THE VOICE OF THE SLUGGARD,”’ said the",
|
|
|
+ "Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘How the creatures order one about, and make one repeat lessons!’",
|
|
|
+ "thought Alice; ‘I might as well be at school at once.’ However, she",
|
|
|
+ "got up, and began to repeat it, but her head was so full of the Lobster",
|
|
|
+ "Quadrille, that she hardly knew what she was saying, and the words came",
|
|
|
+ "very queer indeed:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘’Tis the voice of the Lobster; I heard him declare,",
|
|
|
+ " “You have baked me too brown, I must sugar my hair.”",
|
|
|
+ " As a duck with its eyelids, so he with his nose",
|
|
|
+ " Trims his belt and his buttons, and turns out his toes.’",
|
|
|
+ " [later editions continued as follows",
|
|
|
+ " When the sands are all dry, he is gay as a lark,",
|
|
|
+ " And will talk in contemptuous tones of the Shark,",
|
|
|
+ " But, when the tide rises and sharks are around,",
|
|
|
+ " His voice has a timid and tremulous sound.]",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s different from what I used to say when I was a child,’ said the",
|
|
|
+ "Gryphon.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, I never heard it before,’ said the Mock Turtle; ‘but it sounds",
|
|
|
+ "uncommon nonsense.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice said nothing; she had sat down with her face in her hands,",
|
|
|
+ "wondering if anything would EVER happen in a natural way again.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I should like to have it explained,’ said the Mock Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "‘She can’t explain it,’ said the Gryphon hastily. ‘Go on with the next",
|
|
|
+ "verse.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But about his toes?’ the Mock Turtle persisted. ‘How COULD he turn them",
|
|
|
+ "out with his nose, you know?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s the first position in dancing.’ Alice said; but was dreadfully",
|
|
|
+ "puzzled by the whole thing, and longed to change the subject.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Go on with the next verse,’ the Gryphon repeated impatiently: ‘it",
|
|
|
+ "begins “I passed by his garden.”’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice did not dare to disobey, though she felt sure it would all come",
|
|
|
+ "wrong, and she went on in a trembling voice:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘I passed by his garden, and marked, with one eye,",
|
|
|
+ " How the Owl and the Panther were sharing a pie--’",
|
|
|
+ " [later editions continued as follows",
|
|
|
+ " The Panther took pie-crust, and gravy, and meat,",
|
|
|
+ " While the Owl had the dish as its share of the treat.",
|
|
|
+ " When the pie was all finished, the Owl, as a boon,",
|
|
|
+ " Was kindly permitted to pocket the spoon:",
|
|
|
+ " While the Panther received knife and fork with a growl,",
|
|
|
+ " And concluded the banquet--]",
|
|
|
+ "‘What IS the use of repeating all that stuff,’ the Mock Turtle",
|
|
|
+ "interrupted, ‘if you don’t explain it as you go on? It’s by far the most",
|
|
|
+ "confusing thing I ever heard!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, I think you’d better leave off,’ said the Gryphon: and Alice was",
|
|
|
+ "only too glad to do so.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Shall we try another figure of the Lobster Quadrille?’ the Gryphon went",
|
|
|
+ "on. ‘Or would you like the Mock Turtle to sing you a song?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, a song, please, if the Mock Turtle would be so kind,’ Alice",
|
|
|
+ "replied, so eagerly that the Gryphon said, in a rather offended tone,",
|
|
|
+ "‘Hm! No accounting for tastes! Sing her “Turtle Soup,” will you, old",
|
|
|
+ "fellow?’",
|
|
|
+ "The Mock Turtle sighed deeply, and began, in a voice sometimes choked",
|
|
|
+ "with sobs, to sing this:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Beautiful Soup, so rich and green,",
|
|
|
+ " Waiting in a hot tureen!",
|
|
|
+ " Who for such dainties would not stoop?",
|
|
|
+ " Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup!",
|
|
|
+ " Soup of the evening, beautiful Soup!",
|
|
|
+ " Beau--ootiful Soo--oop!",
|
|
|
+ " Beau--ootiful Soo--oop!",
|
|
|
+ " Soo--oop of the e--e--evening,",
|
|
|
+ " Beautiful, beautiful Soup!",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Beautiful Soup! Who cares for fish,",
|
|
|
+ " Game, or any other dish?",
|
|
|
+ " Who would not give all else for two",
|
|
|
+ " Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup?",
|
|
|
+ " Pennyworth only of beautiful Soup?",
|
|
|
+ " Beau--ootiful Soo--oop!",
|
|
|
+ " Beau--ootiful Soo--oop!",
|
|
|
+ " Soo--oop of the e--e--evening,",
|
|
|
+ " Beautiful, beauti--FUL SOUP!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Chorus again!’ cried the Gryphon, and the Mock Turtle had just begun",
|
|
|
+ "to repeat it, when a cry of ‘The trial’s beginning!’ was heard in the",
|
|
|
+ "distance.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come on!’ cried the Gryphon, and, taking Alice by the hand, it hurried",
|
|
|
+ "off, without waiting for the end of the song.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What trial is it?’ Alice panted as she ran; but the Gryphon only",
|
|
|
+ "answered ‘Come on!’ and ran the faster, while more and more faintly",
|
|
|
+ "came, carried on the breeze that followed them, the melancholy words:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘Soo--oop of the e--e--evening,",
|
|
|
+ " Beautiful, beautiful Soup!’",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER XI. Who Stole the Tarts?",
|
|
|
+ "The King and Queen of Hearts were seated on their throne when they",
|
|
|
+ "arrived, with a great crowd assembled about them--all sorts of little",
|
|
|
+ "birds and beasts, as well as the whole pack of cards: the Knave was",
|
|
|
+ "standing before them, in chains, with a soldier on each side to guard",
|
|
|
+ "him; and near the King was the White Rabbit, with a trumpet in one hand,",
|
|
|
+ "and a scroll of parchment in the other. In the very middle of the court",
|
|
|
+ "was a table, with a large dish of tarts upon it: they looked so good,",
|
|
|
+ "that it made Alice quite hungry to look at them--‘I wish they’d get the",
|
|
|
+ "trial done,’ she thought, ‘and hand round the refreshments!’ But there",
|
|
|
+ "seemed to be no chance of this, so she began looking at everything about",
|
|
|
+ "her, to pass away the time.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice had never been in a court of justice before, but she had read",
|
|
|
+ "about them in books, and she was quite pleased to find that she knew",
|
|
|
+ "the name of nearly everything there. ‘That’s the judge,’ she said to",
|
|
|
+ "herself, ‘because of his great wig.’",
|
|
|
+ "The judge, by the way, was the King; and as he wore his crown over the",
|
|
|
+ "wig, (look at the frontispiece if you want to see how he did it,) he did",
|
|
|
+ "not look at all comfortable, and it was certainly not becoming.",
|
|
|
+ "‘And that’s the jury-box,’ thought Alice, ‘and those twelve creatures,’",
|
|
|
+ "(she was obliged to say ‘creatures,’ you see, because some of them were",
|
|
|
+ "animals, and some were birds,) ‘I suppose they are the jurors.’ She said",
|
|
|
+ "this last word two or three times over to herself, being rather proud of",
|
|
|
+ "it: for she thought, and rightly too, that very few little girls of her",
|
|
|
+ "age knew the meaning of it at all. However, ‘jury-men’ would have done",
|
|
|
+ "just as well.",
|
|
|
+ "The twelve jurors were all writing very busily on slates. ‘What are they",
|
|
|
+ "doing?’ Alice whispered to the Gryphon. ‘They can’t have anything to put",
|
|
|
+ "down yet, before the trial’s begun.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘They’re putting down their names,’ the Gryphon whispered in reply, ‘for",
|
|
|
+ "fear they should forget them before the end of the trial.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Stupid things!’ Alice began in a loud, indignant voice, but she stopped",
|
|
|
+ "hastily, for the White Rabbit cried out, ‘Silence in the court!’ and the",
|
|
|
+ "King put on his spectacles and looked anxiously round, to make out who",
|
|
|
+ "was talking.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice could see, as well as if she were looking over their shoulders,",
|
|
|
+ "that all the jurors were writing down ‘stupid things!’ on their slates,",
|
|
|
+ "and she could even make out that one of them didn’t know how to spell",
|
|
|
+ "‘stupid,’ and that he had to ask his neighbour to tell him. ‘A nice",
|
|
|
+ "muddle their slates’ll be in before the trial’s over!’ thought Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "One of the jurors had a pencil that squeaked. This of course, Alice",
|
|
|
+ "could not stand, and she went round the court and got behind him, and",
|
|
|
+ "very soon found an opportunity of taking it away. She did it so quickly",
|
|
|
+ "that the poor little juror (it was Bill, the Lizard) could not make out",
|
|
|
+ "at all what had become of it; so, after hunting all about for it, he was",
|
|
|
+ "obliged to write with one finger for the rest of the day; and this was",
|
|
|
+ "of very little use, as it left no mark on the slate.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Herald, read the accusation!’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "On this the White Rabbit blew three blasts on the trumpet, and then",
|
|
|
+ "unrolled the parchment scroll, and read as follows:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘The Queen of Hearts, she made some tarts,",
|
|
|
+ " All on a summer day:",
|
|
|
+ " The Knave of Hearts, he stole those tarts,",
|
|
|
+ " And took them quite away!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Consider your verdict,’ the King said to the jury.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Not yet, not yet!’ the Rabbit hastily interrupted. ‘There’s a great",
|
|
|
+ "deal to come before that!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Call the first witness,’ said the King; and the White Rabbit blew three",
|
|
|
+ "blasts on the trumpet, and called out, ‘First witness!’",
|
|
|
+ "The first witness was the Hatter. He came in with a teacup in one",
|
|
|
+ "hand and a piece of bread-and-butter in the other. ‘I beg pardon, your",
|
|
|
+ "Majesty,’ he began, ‘for bringing these in: but I hadn’t quite finished",
|
|
|
+ "my tea when I was sent for.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You ought to have finished,’ said the King. ‘When did you begin?’",
|
|
|
+ "The Hatter looked at the March Hare, who had followed him into the",
|
|
|
+ "court, arm-in-arm with the Dormouse. ‘Fourteenth of March, I think it",
|
|
|
+ "was,’ he said.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Fifteenth,’ said the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Sixteenth,’ added the Dormouse.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Write that down,’ the King said to the jury, and the jury eagerly",
|
|
|
+ "wrote down all three dates on their slates, and then added them up, and",
|
|
|
+ "reduced the answer to shillings and pence.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Take off your hat,’ the King said to the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It isn’t mine,’ said the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Stolen!’ the King exclaimed, turning to the jury, who instantly made a",
|
|
|
+ "memorandum of the fact.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I keep them to sell,’ the Hatter added as an explanation; ‘I’ve none of",
|
|
|
+ "my own. I’m a hatter.’",
|
|
|
+ "Here the Queen put on her spectacles, and began staring at the Hatter,",
|
|
|
+ "who turned pale and fidgeted.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Give your evidence,’ said the King; ‘and don’t be nervous, or I’ll have",
|
|
|
+ "you executed on the spot.’",
|
|
|
+ "This did not seem to encourage the witness at all: he kept shifting",
|
|
|
+ "from one foot to the other, looking uneasily at the Queen, and in",
|
|
|
+ "his confusion he bit a large piece out of his teacup instead of the",
|
|
|
+ "bread-and-butter.",
|
|
|
+ "Just at this moment Alice felt a very curious sensation, which puzzled",
|
|
|
+ "her a good deal until she made out what it was: she was beginning to",
|
|
|
+ "grow larger again, and she thought at first she would get up and leave",
|
|
|
+ "the court; but on second thoughts she decided to remain where she was as",
|
|
|
+ "long as there was room for her.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I wish you wouldn’t squeeze so.’ said the Dormouse, who was sitting",
|
|
|
+ "next to her. ‘I can hardly breathe.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I can’t help it,’ said Alice very meekly: ‘I’m growing.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘You’ve no right to grow here,’ said the Dormouse.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Don’t talk nonsense,’ said Alice more boldly: ‘you know you’re growing",
|
|
|
+ "too.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Yes, but I grow at a reasonable pace,’ said the Dormouse: ‘not in that",
|
|
|
+ "ridiculous fashion.’ And he got up very sulkily and crossed over to the",
|
|
|
+ "other side of the court.",
|
|
|
+ "All this time the Queen had never left off staring at the Hatter, and,",
|
|
|
+ "just as the Dormouse crossed the court, she said to one of the officers",
|
|
|
+ "of the court, ‘Bring me the list of the singers in the last concert!’ on",
|
|
|
+ "which the wretched Hatter trembled so, that he shook both his shoes off.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Give your evidence,’ the King repeated angrily, ‘or I’ll have you",
|
|
|
+ "executed, whether you’re nervous or not.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m a poor man, your Majesty,’ the Hatter began, in a trembling voice,",
|
|
|
+ "‘--and I hadn’t begun my tea--not above a week or so--and what with the",
|
|
|
+ "bread-and-butter getting so thin--and the twinkling of the tea--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘The twinkling of the what?’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It began with the tea,’ the Hatter replied.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Of course twinkling begins with a T!’ said the King sharply. ‘Do you",
|
|
|
+ "take me for a dunce? Go on!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m a poor man,’ the Hatter went on, ‘and most things twinkled after",
|
|
|
+ "that--only the March Hare said--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I didn’t!’ the March Hare interrupted in a great hurry.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You did!’ said the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I deny it!’ said the March Hare.",
|
|
|
+ "‘He denies it,’ said the King: ‘leave out that part.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, at any rate, the Dormouse said--’ the Hatter went on, looking",
|
|
|
+ "anxiously round to see if he would deny it too: but the Dormouse denied",
|
|
|
+ "nothing, being fast asleep.",
|
|
|
+ "‘After that,’ continued the Hatter, ‘I cut some more bread-and-butter--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But what did the Dormouse say?’ one of the jury asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That I can’t remember,’ said the Hatter.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You MUST remember,’ remarked the King, ‘or I’ll have you executed.’",
|
|
|
+ "The miserable Hatter dropped his teacup and bread-and-butter, and went",
|
|
|
+ "down on one knee. ‘I’m a poor man, your Majesty,’ he began.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You’re a very poor speaker,’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "Here one of the guinea-pigs cheered, and was immediately suppressed by",
|
|
|
+ "the officers of the court. (As that is rather a hard word, I will just",
|
|
|
+ "explain to you how it was done. They had a large canvas bag, which tied",
|
|
|
+ "up at the mouth with strings: into this they slipped the guinea-pig,",
|
|
|
+ "head first, and then sat upon it.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’m glad I’ve seen that done,’ thought Alice. ‘I’ve so often read",
|
|
|
+ "in the newspapers, at the end of trials, “There was some attempts",
|
|
|
+ "at applause, which was immediately suppressed by the officers of the",
|
|
|
+ "court,” and I never understood what it meant till now.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘If that’s all you know about it, you may stand down,’ continued the",
|
|
|
+ "King.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I can’t go no lower,’ said the Hatter: ‘I’m on the floor, as it is.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then you may SIT down,’ the King replied.",
|
|
|
+ "Here the other guinea-pig cheered, and was suppressed.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Come, that finished the guinea-pigs!’ thought Alice. ‘Now we shall get",
|
|
|
+ "on better.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’d rather finish my tea,’ said the Hatter, with an anxious look at the",
|
|
|
+ "Queen, who was reading the list of singers.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You may go,’ said the King, and the Hatter hurriedly left the court,",
|
|
|
+ "without even waiting to put his shoes on.",
|
|
|
+ "‘--and just take his head off outside,’ the Queen added to one of the",
|
|
|
+ "officers: but the Hatter was out of sight before the officer could get",
|
|
|
+ "to the door.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Call the next witness!’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "The next witness was the Duchess’s cook. She carried the pepper-box in",
|
|
|
+ "her hand, and Alice guessed who it was, even before she got into the",
|
|
|
+ "court, by the way the people near the door began sneezing all at once.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Give your evidence,’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Shan’t,’ said the cook.",
|
|
|
+ "The King looked anxiously at the White Rabbit, who said in a low voice,",
|
|
|
+ "‘Your Majesty must cross-examine THIS witness.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, if I must, I must,’ the King said, with a melancholy air, and,",
|
|
|
+ "after folding his arms and frowning at the cook till his eyes were",
|
|
|
+ "nearly out of sight, he said in a deep voice, ‘What are tarts made of?’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Pepper, mostly,’ said the cook.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Treacle,’ said a sleepy voice behind her.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Collar that Dormouse,’ the Queen shrieked out. ‘Behead that Dormouse!",
|
|
|
+ "Turn that Dormouse out of court! Suppress him! Pinch him! Off with his",
|
|
|
+ "whiskers!’",
|
|
|
+ "For some minutes the whole court was in confusion, getting the Dormouse",
|
|
|
+ "turned out, and, by the time they had settled down again, the cook had",
|
|
|
+ "disappeared.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Never mind!’ said the King, with an air of great relief. ‘Call the next",
|
|
|
+ "witness.’ And he added in an undertone to the Queen, ‘Really, my dear,",
|
|
|
+ "YOU must cross-examine the next witness. It quite makes my forehead",
|
|
|
+ "ache!’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice watched the White Rabbit as he fumbled over the list, feeling very",
|
|
|
+ "curious to see what the next witness would be like, ‘--for they haven’t",
|
|
|
+ "got much evidence YET,’ she said to herself. Imagine her surprise, when",
|
|
|
+ "the White Rabbit read out, at the top of his shrill little voice, the",
|
|
|
+ "name ‘Alice!’",
|
|
|
+ "CHAPTER XII. Alice’s Evidence",
|
|
|
+ "‘Here!’ cried Alice, quite forgetting in the flurry of the moment how",
|
|
|
+ "large she had grown in the last few minutes, and she jumped up in such",
|
|
|
+ "a hurry that she tipped over the jury-box with the edge of her skirt,",
|
|
|
+ "upsetting all the jurymen on to the heads of the crowd below, and there",
|
|
|
+ "they lay sprawling about, reminding her very much of a globe of goldfish",
|
|
|
+ "she had accidentally upset the week before.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, I BEG your pardon!’ she exclaimed in a tone of great dismay, and",
|
|
|
+ "began picking them up again as quickly as she could, for the accident of",
|
|
|
+ "the goldfish kept running in her head, and she had a vague sort of idea",
|
|
|
+ "that they must be collected at once and put back into the jury-box, or",
|
|
|
+ "they would die.",
|
|
|
+ "‘The trial cannot proceed,’ said the King in a very grave voice, ‘until",
|
|
|
+ "all the jurymen are back in their proper places--ALL,’ he repeated with",
|
|
|
+ "great emphasis, looking hard at Alice as he said do.",
|
|
|
+ "Alice looked at the jury-box, and saw that, in her haste, she had put",
|
|
|
+ "the Lizard in head downwards, and the poor little thing was waving its",
|
|
|
+ "tail about in a melancholy way, being quite unable to move. She soon got",
|
|
|
+ "it out again, and put it right; ‘not that it signifies much,’ she said",
|
|
|
+ "to herself; ‘I should think it would be QUITE as much use in the trial",
|
|
|
+ "one way up as the other.’",
|
|
|
+ "As soon as the jury had a little recovered from the shock of being",
|
|
|
+ "upset, and their slates and pencils had been found and handed back to",
|
|
|
+ "them, they set to work very diligently to write out a history of the",
|
|
|
+ "accident, all except the Lizard, who seemed too much overcome to do",
|
|
|
+ "anything but sit with its mouth open, gazing up into the roof of the",
|
|
|
+ "court.",
|
|
|
+ "‘What do you know about this business?’ the King said to Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nothing,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nothing WHATEVER?’ persisted the King.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nothing whatever,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s very important,’ the King said, turning to the jury. They were",
|
|
|
+ "just beginning to write this down on their slates, when the White Rabbit",
|
|
|
+ "interrupted: ‘UNimportant, your Majesty means, of course,’ he said in a",
|
|
|
+ "very respectful tone, but frowning and making faces at him as he spoke.",
|
|
|
+ "‘UNimportant, of course, I meant,’ the King hastily said, and went on",
|
|
|
+ "to himself in an undertone,",
|
|
|
+ "‘important--unimportant--unimportant--important--’ as if he were trying",
|
|
|
+ "which word sounded best.",
|
|
|
+ "Some of the jury wrote it down ‘important,’ and some ‘unimportant.’",
|
|
|
+ "Alice could see this, as she was near enough to look over their slates;",
|
|
|
+ "‘but it doesn’t matter a bit,’ she thought to herself.",
|
|
|
+ "At this moment the King, who had been for some time busily writing in",
|
|
|
+ "his note-book, cackled out ‘Silence!’ and read out from his book, ‘Rule",
|
|
|
+ "Forty-two. ALL PERSONS MORE THAN A MILE HIGH TO LEAVE THE COURT.’",
|
|
|
+ "Everybody looked at Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I’M not a mile high,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘You are,’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Nearly two miles high,’ added the Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Well, I shan’t go, at any rate,’ said Alice: ‘besides, that’s not a",
|
|
|
+ "regular rule: you invented it just now.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s the oldest rule in the book,’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then it ought to be Number One,’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "The King turned pale, and shut his note-book hastily. ‘Consider your",
|
|
|
+ "verdict,’ he said to the jury, in a low, trembling voice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘There’s more evidence to come yet, please your Majesty,’ said the White",
|
|
|
+ "Rabbit, jumping up in a great hurry; ‘this paper has just been picked",
|
|
|
+ "up.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘What’s in it?’ said the Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I haven’t opened it yet,’ said the White Rabbit, ‘but it seems to be a",
|
|
|
+ "letter, written by the prisoner to--to somebody.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘It must have been that,’ said the King, ‘unless it was written to",
|
|
|
+ "nobody, which isn’t usual, you know.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Who is it directed to?’ said one of the jurymen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It isn’t directed at all,’ said the White Rabbit; ‘in fact, there’s",
|
|
|
+ "nothing written on the OUTSIDE.’ He unfolded the paper as he spoke, and",
|
|
|
+ "added ‘It isn’t a letter, after all: it’s a set of verses.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Are they in the prisoner’s handwriting?’ asked another of the jurymen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, they’re not,’ said the White Rabbit, ‘and that’s the queerest thing",
|
|
|
+ "about it.’ (The jury all looked puzzled.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘He must have imitated somebody else’s hand,’ said the King. (The jury",
|
|
|
+ "all brightened up again.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘Please your Majesty,’ said the Knave, ‘I didn’t write it, and they",
|
|
|
+ "can’t prove I did: there’s no name signed at the end.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘If you didn’t sign it,’ said the King, ‘that only makes the matter",
|
|
|
+ "worse. You MUST have meant some mischief, or else you’d have signed your",
|
|
|
+ "name like an honest man.’",
|
|
|
+ "There was a general clapping of hands at this: it was the first really",
|
|
|
+ "clever thing the King had said that day.",
|
|
|
+ "‘That PROVES his guilt,’ said the Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It proves nothing of the sort!’ said Alice. ‘Why, you don’t even know",
|
|
|
+ "what they’re about!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Read them,’ said the King.",
|
|
|
+ "The White Rabbit put on his spectacles. ‘Where shall I begin, please",
|
|
|
+ "your Majesty?’ he asked.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Begin at the beginning,’ the King said gravely, ‘and go on till you",
|
|
|
+ "come to the end: then stop.’",
|
|
|
+ "These were the verses the White Rabbit read:--",
|
|
|
+ " ‘They told me you had been to her,",
|
|
|
+ " And mentioned me to him:",
|
|
|
+ " She gave me a good character,",
|
|
|
+ " But said I could not swim.",
|
|
|
+ " He sent them word I had not gone",
|
|
|
+ " (We know it to be true):",
|
|
|
+ " If she should push the matter on,",
|
|
|
+ " What would become of you?",
|
|
|
+ " I gave her one, they gave him two,",
|
|
|
+ " You gave us three or more;",
|
|
|
+ " They all returned from him to you,",
|
|
|
+ " Though they were mine before.",
|
|
|
+ " If I or she should chance to be",
|
|
|
+ " Involved in this affair,",
|
|
|
+ " He trusts to you to set them free,",
|
|
|
+ " Exactly as we were.",
|
|
|
+ " My notion was that you had been",
|
|
|
+ " (Before she had this fit)",
|
|
|
+ " An obstacle that came between",
|
|
|
+ " Him, and ourselves, and it.",
|
|
|
+ " Don’t let him know she liked them best,",
|
|
|
+ " For this must ever be",
|
|
|
+ " A secret, kept from all the rest,",
|
|
|
+ " Between yourself and me.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘That’s the most important piece of evidence we’ve heard yet,’ said the",
|
|
|
+ "King, rubbing his hands; ‘so now let the jury--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘If any one of them can explain it,’ said Alice, (she had grown so large",
|
|
|
+ "in the last few minutes that she wasn’t a bit afraid of interrupting",
|
|
|
+ "him,) ‘I’ll give him sixpence. _I_ don’t believe there’s an atom of",
|
|
|
+ "meaning in it.’",
|
|
|
+ "The jury all wrote down on their slates, ‘SHE doesn’t believe there’s an",
|
|
|
+ "atom of meaning in it,’ but none of them attempted to explain the paper.",
|
|
|
+ "‘If there’s no meaning in it,’ said the King, ‘that saves a world of",
|
|
|
+ "trouble, you know, as we needn’t try to find any. And yet I don’t know,’",
|
|
|
+ "he went on, spreading out the verses on his knee, and looking at them",
|
|
|
+ "with one eye; ‘I seem to see some meaning in them, after all. “--SAID",
|
|
|
+ "I COULD NOT SWIM--” you can’t swim, can you?’ he added, turning to the",
|
|
|
+ "Knave.",
|
|
|
+ "The Knave shook his head sadly. ‘Do I look like it?’ he said. (Which he",
|
|
|
+ "certainly did NOT, being made entirely of cardboard.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘All right, so far,’ said the King, and he went on muttering over",
|
|
|
+ "the verses to himself: ‘“WE KNOW IT TO BE TRUE--” that’s the jury, of",
|
|
|
+ "course--“I GAVE HER ONE, THEY GAVE HIM TWO--” why, that must be what he",
|
|
|
+ "did with the tarts, you know--’",
|
|
|
+ "‘But, it goes on “THEY ALL RETURNED FROM HIM TO YOU,”’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Why, there they are!’ said the King triumphantly, pointing to the tarts",
|
|
|
+ "on the table. ‘Nothing can be clearer than THAT. Then again--“BEFORE SHE",
|
|
|
+ "HAD THIS FIT--” you never had fits, my dear, I think?’ he said to the",
|
|
|
+ "Queen.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Never!’ said the Queen furiously, throwing an inkstand at the Lizard",
|
|
|
+ "as she spoke. (The unfortunate little Bill had left off writing on his",
|
|
|
+ "slate with one finger, as he found it made no mark; but he now hastily",
|
|
|
+ "began again, using the ink, that was trickling down his face, as long as",
|
|
|
+ "it lasted.)",
|
|
|
+ "‘Then the words don’t FIT you,’ said the King, looking round the court",
|
|
|
+ "with a smile. There was a dead silence.",
|
|
|
+ "‘It’s a pun!’ the King added in an offended tone, and everybody laughed,",
|
|
|
+ "‘Let the jury consider their verdict,’ the King said, for about the",
|
|
|
+ "twentieth time that day.",
|
|
|
+ "‘No, no!’ said the Queen. ‘Sentence first--verdict afterwards.’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Stuff and nonsense!’ said Alice loudly. ‘The idea of having the",
|
|
|
+ "sentence first!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Hold your tongue!’ said the Queen, turning purple.",
|
|
|
+ "‘I won’t!’ said Alice.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Off with her head!’ the Queen shouted at the top of her voice. Nobody",
|
|
|
+ "moved.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Who cares for you?’ said Alice, (she had grown to her full size by this",
|
|
|
+ "time.) ‘You’re nothing but a pack of cards!’",
|
|
|
+ "At this the whole pack rose up into the air, and came flying down upon",
|
|
|
+ "her: she gave a little scream, half of fright and half of anger, and",
|
|
|
+ "tried to beat them off, and found herself lying on the bank, with her",
|
|
|
+ "head in the lap of her sister, who was gently brushing away some dead",
|
|
|
+ "leaves that had fluttered down from the trees upon her face.",
|
|
|
+ "‘Wake up, Alice dear!’ said her sister; ‘Why, what a long sleep you’ve",
|
|
|
+ "had!’",
|
|
|
+ "‘Oh, I’ve had such a curious dream!’ said Alice, and she told her",
|
|
|
+ "sister, as well as she could remember them, all these strange Adventures",
|
|
|
+ "of hers that you have just been reading about; and when she had",
|
|
|
+ "finished, her sister kissed her, and said, ‘It WAS a curious dream,",
|
|
|
+ "dear, certainly: but now run in to your tea; it’s getting late.’ So",
|
|
|
+ "Alice got up and ran off, thinking while she ran, as well she might,",
|
|
|
+ "what a wonderful dream it had been.",
|
|
|
+ "But her sister sat still just as she left her, leaning her head on her",
|
|
|
+ "hand, watching the setting sun, and thinking of little Alice and all her",
|
|
|
+ "wonderful Adventures, till she too began dreaming after a fashion, and",
|
|
|
+ "this was her dream:--",
|
|
|
+ "First, she dreamed of little Alice herself, and once again the tiny",
|
|
|
+ "hands were clasped upon her knee, and the bright eager eyes were looking",
|
|
|
+ "up into hers--she could hear the very tones of her voice, and see that",
|
|
|
+ "queer little toss of her head to keep back the wandering hair that",
|
|
|
+ "WOULD always get into her eyes--and still as she listened, or seemed to",
|
|
|
+ "listen, the whole place around her became alive with the strange creatures",
|
|
|
+ "of her little sister’s dream.",
|
|
|
+ "The long grass rustled at her feet as the White Rabbit hurried by--the",
|
|
|
+ "frightened Mouse splashed his way through the neighbouring pool--she",
|
|
|
+ "could hear the rattle of the teacups as the March Hare and his friends",
|
|
|
+ "shared their never-ending meal, and the shrill voice of the Queen",
|
|
|
+ "ordering off her unfortunate guests to execution--once more the pig-baby",
|
|
|
+ "was sneezing on the Duchess’s knee, while plates and dishes crashed",
|
|
|
+ "around it--once more the shriek of the Gryphon, the squeaking of the",
|
|
|
+ "Lizard’s slate-pencil, and the choking of the suppressed guinea-pigs,",
|
|
|
+ "filled the air, mixed up with the distant sobs of the miserable Mock",
|
|
|
+ "Turtle.",
|
|
|
+ "So she sat on, with closed eyes, and half believed herself in",
|
|
|
+ "Wonderland, though she knew she had but to open them again, and all",
|
|
|
+ "would change to dull reality--the grass would be only rustling in the",
|
|
|
+ "wind, and the pool rippling to the waving of the reeds--the rattling",
|
|
|
+ "teacups would change to tinkling sheep-bells, and the Queen’s shrill",
|
|
|
+ "cries to the voice of the shepherd boy--and the sneeze of the baby, the",
|
|
|
+ "shriek of the Gryphon, and all the other queer noises, would change (she",
|
|
|
+ "knew) to the confused clamour of the busy farm-yard--while the lowing",
|
|
|
+ "of the cattle in the distance would take the place of the Mock Turtle’s",
|
|
|
+ "heavy sobs.",
|
|
|
+ "Lastly, she pictured to herself how this same little sister of hers",
|
|
|
+ "would, in the after-time, be herself a grown woman; and how she would",
|
|
|
+ "keep, through all her riper years, the simple and loving heart of her",
|
|
|
+ "childhood: and how she would gather about her other little children, and",
|
|
|
+ "make THEIR eyes bright and eager with many a strange tale, perhaps even",
|
|
|
+ "with the dream of Wonderland of long ago: and how she would feel with",
|
|
|
+ "all their simple sorrows, and find a pleasure in all their simple joys,",
|
|
|
+ "remembering her own child-life, and the happy summer days.",
|
|
|
+ " THE END",
|
|
|
+ "End of Project Gutenberg’s Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, by Lewis Carroll",
|
|
|
+ "*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ALICE’S ADVENTURES IN WONDERLAND ***",
|
|
|
+ "***** This file should be named 11-0.txt or 11-0.zip *****",
|
|
|
+ "This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:",
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|
|
+ " http://www.gutenberg.org/1/11/",
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|
+ "Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions",
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+ "will be renamed.",
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+ "Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no",
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+ "one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation",
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+ "(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without",
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+ "permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules,",
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+ "subject to the trademark license, especially commercial",
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